KAtusm

The main difference is whether they interfere with your function or goals in life. I have friends who make seven figures and play 40 hours of games per week. They're happy with where they are.

I have other friends who play games for 60 hours a week, live in their parents' basement, and have big hopes and dreams, but never move towards them in a substantial way.

If your life isn't going in the direction that you want, and you're playing a ton of games, that's a problem.

Does that answer your question?

Fantastic question.

Substance use disorders are usually different from behavioral disorders, in a neuroscientific sense. Substance use disorders, such as alcoholism or heroin addiction, are biological substances that artificially activate dopamine reward circuitry in the brain (among other circuits, such as suppressing or affecting your limbic system).

Behavioral addictions, on the other hand, have far more complex mechanisms, but also affect dopamine reward systems (which makes games fun). For example, many gamers derive a sense of pride, identity, and accomplishment from playing games. This is one of the things that pulls people so heavily into games. I have never met a heroin addict who is proud of all of the things he's done related to heroin use.

At the end of the day, both are addictions because they are harmful behaviors that prevent people from achieving what they want in life. Gaming, however, also has a lot of positive impacts on people's lives. I have friends who met their spouses through video games, and I've maintained a lot of wonderful relationships through gaming.

Does that sufficiently answer your question? It's quite a complicated one, and I can go into more detail about neurocircuitry.

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EDIT #1: I see that I misread your question - what is the difference in treatment.

Some treatment is common, such as using cognitive behavioral techniques to help people understand what the driving forces behind their use is.

The biggest difference is that for the biological addictions, there are pharmacologic treatments: such as suboxone for heroin addiction, which provides a controlled form of opiate with an opiate blocker to prevent injection, or naltrexone to curb cravings and the reinforcing effects of alcohol. Nothing like this exists with video game addiction.

Lastly, video game addiction is a relatively new phenomenon, so I don't actually know of any scientifically validated treatments that exist. For example, the World Health Organization just classified video game addiction as a problem in 2018.

Can you please elaborate?

Amazing questions, all insightful and complex.

I'll start with #3 - basically all the questions being asked in this thread, especially yours.

1: Yes, men seem to be more prone to video games than women - for example, in the German study 8.4% of boys sampled met the criteria for video game addiction, versus an overall 5.0% when considering both genders.

Risk does change across age groups - there is overwhelming evidence that early exposure to substances (and likely video games) leads to a greater chance to be addicted. Developing brains are vulnerable, and adding artificial dopaminergic chemicals in the mix when you're 15 has a way higher chance of developing into addictive behavior than when you're 30.

For the gender variation, it's a fascinating subject, and one that I ask myself daily. 80%+ of the gamers I've worked with are men. I'm still trying to understand why (as the data suggests that while there is a gender difference, it isn't anywhere near 80/20).

One hypothesis I have is that boys are socialized to minimize their emotional expression, and thereby minimize their understanding of emotions. Over time, this develops into a state called alexithymia, or inability to understand one's emotional state. Men are socialized to be able to express one emotion: anger. Any other emotion is considered "unmanly." If you're crying, you should "man up" and "be strong" because that's what men are supposed to do. As boys learn to suppress emotions at an early age, I think that makes them crave experiences that allow them to experience and channel emotions, such as video games. Most men I work with have a lot of difficulty understanding that they feel shame or fear, they usually mask it as "frustration." They just know that they feel bad, and that games help them "destress."

But they never get to the underlying cause of why they're "stressed" (another acceptable state for men to be in), and so play games to "destress." But the fix is temporary, because they don't process the underlying emotion. So they play more, and more, and more.

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Regarding #2, there is ample data (fMRI studies) that suggest different substances trigger dopamine reward circuitry for different people. Some people's brain's are just wired to light up like a christmas tree when drinking, others when doing heroin, others when doing pot (but marijuana is a bit more complex). There is strong evidence that this substance-dopamine circuit interaction is at least partially hereditary, given that alcoholism tends to run in some families, whereas opiate addiction runs in others.

If it is OK with you, I'll skip references for now to try to answer other questions. PM me in a day or two if you want additional reading material.

This is a really good question, and a really hard issue.

The challenge here is to try to demonstrate her behavior without making her feel defensive. Also, she's probably projecting her own fears of being addicted onto you, which is why she accuses you of being addicted.

Here's a line of dialogue you can try:

"Hey mom. I've noticed that when I come over, you seem to enjoy playing Yahtzee a lot. I usually like to play Fiddle Game, because it is so ***. What do you like so much about Yahtzee?"

<Her answer, hopefully not defensive>.

"Yea, that sounds very fun. I was curious, do you think how much we use our cell phones impacts our time together?"

Note that here, you're not actually saying that it is good or bad, you're inviting her to reflect about whether there is an impact. If she attacks you, saying that your cell phone use is a problem, then don't get pulled into defending yourself.

"I hear that you're saying that when I play Fiddle Games, it makes you feel unheard. Is that correct?"

"It also sounds like playing Yahtzee doesn't seem to impact our time together. Sometimes I feel like I don't have your full attention. Is that a fair way for me to feel, or do you think I'm blowing things out of proportion?"

Hopefully, that'll open the conversation somewhat. A couple of things to avoid:

-Don't make comparisons. Comparisons make people feel defensive.

-Ask for her opinion, and try to get an understanding of how she sees her cell phone use.

-Try to focus on your experience of things, instead of blaming her behavior. "I feel like when I come over, we're not able to communicate the way we used to. Is there anything either of us can do to improve the time we spend together?"

-When you set a frame of inquiry and curiosity, it increases the likelihood she'll be receptive instead of defensive. If you're curious, she's more likely to be the same. Human beings mirror each other. If you introduce yourself, the other person feels a strong compulsion to do the same. Set the right tone for the conversation and you'll have a better chance at engaging her.

Hope that helps. If it doesn't, you could always find a family therapist. It's harder to do than I make it sound.