Ididntmakethisforyou

Extremely horrifying. It was like hell. It was like being abducted by aliens and total sensory overwhelm. Everything was too bright and i could see everyone looking at me. I felt like they all knew somehting important that I didn't, and i knew whatever was happening really wasn't good. Thank you for your question

I know names now. I think I could answer most questions appropriately right now, But i'm going to go back and look at this AMA later and then decide. I've been in a cold-sweat for pretty much constantly. my boyfriend kept saying "i love you. i love you" and he said i responded "i don't understand, I'm confused" and he said that made him very sad. then when we were in the hospital, he asked me questions aobut Grey's Anatomy and i answered them, and then he was all smiles and knew I would be ok. We talked about George and Izzie and Addison Montgomery.

oh and PS I had a job interview this morning. I cried before and after and I have no idea if she thought i was retarded, or what, but i got the job :'D

I play the piano. I'm not awesome, but i took lessons for years. I have a nice pretty blonde one, and playing it always calms me down because i feel like the music gets in my head and that's all i can do, you know? no room for stress. I don't understand all of your words. I wish i could explain to you how to phrase questions so i understand, but i have no idea. i am currently without parental supervision, and i dipped a paper candy holder in peppermint oil and then lit it on fire to try and get my candle to light and boy did it NOT work. huge flames though. i googled "flammable" and had to read every word on the bottle to confirm that peppermint oil would catch flame. see what I mean? my brain is everywhere. My plan is to come back when these symptoms leave (which hopefully will be SOON) and decipher some of this shit. things that calm me down: cuddling, crying, LOUD familiar music, candles, peppermint oil, orange juice, ice cream, my dogs. definitely definitely my dogs.

Thanks :) that's really nice. It made me cry, but don't worry. Everything makes me cry right now.

"potential long term medical issues" doesn't make sense to me, I'm sorry. At the hospital. I kept clutching him. I was disoriented, and told the triage that I was 28!! I'm only 23!

oh jeez. Yeah, i heard that can happen. My boyfriend's ex girlfriend has been threatening to take our dogs since we wouldn't give her money for an air bnb to visit. i was alone in a very visible room every day for weeks and weeks. the house was under construction. I left a culty-religion and my parents found out i had my names removed from the records, even though that's illegal and i used a lawyer so it shouldn't have happened. we stopped drinking 147 days ago. i quit a really good paying job to move hours away with my boyfriend while we build a house together. our living situation is stressful and no matter what we do, it doesn't feel like it's enough. It's a lot of changes all at once. I got in a car crash around christmas time and my boyfriend fixed my car, and my dad told me I'm a maniuplative lying bitch. it was really hard on me, and i was really despressed for a long time.