I_am_usually_a_dick

oh man, hadn't even thought about that. it must be very expensive to live comfortably when everything is made to fit 'normal' and you are two sizes too big.

Hey unlimitedHolo,

I grew up in Durango and while that is pretty far from Columbine we are CO kids. I remember seeing the news on a lunch break at college about the shooting and it felt very personal to me. it still does. not to be indelicate but is your mom doing okay? I felt this hard as a fellow Colorado native, I cannot imagine being a survivor. I have a great deal of sympathy for the friends and family of those lost but a great deal more for those who survived. survivor guilt is nasty. does she talk about it? is she okay? (I guess your existence probably means they didn't ruin her life but ugh, I imagine every school shooting since is like lemon juice on a paper cut, just when you thought you were getting clear of it).

sorry to be wordy. this is one of those events that troubles me still...

this is a good question, I totally stopped smoking weed because it either put me immediately to sleep or I was too high and it wasn't enjoyable - like incapable of doing anything, even watching TV. I know people will laugh but there is a point of too much, like being throwing up drunk with bed spins vs light buzz at a BBQ.

I am 6'3" and that is just below the cusp of getting stared at and I tend to be the tallest person in the room but not so much taller that I completely stand out.
I notice it is a really weird feeling to look up at someone to look them in eye, I can feel it in the back of my neck, a weird twinge of muscles that aren't used very often. I suppose short people have the opposite where it feels weird to look down into someone's eyes.

not to sound overly adult and stupid but if you view it as a filter for dicks and douche bags you may see it as a blessing. anyone who is remotely weird about it isn't worth your time.

I know everyone seems important when you are 14, trust me just this once: not the case, it is okay to usually be a dick to 80% of people.