Gods__Accident

You're an epic inspiration!

TBH I'm an ex-meth addict.. I developed a drug induced psychosis and refused to seek treatment.. when under the influence I did stupid things I wouldn't have done if I was thinking properly and developed a criminal record..

It got to the stage where my mother tricked me and took me to her home country where there is an involuntary submission process for drug addicts based on the parents concerns.. I did 10 months in rehab and my auditory hallucinations and paranoia left after about the 3rd to 4th month..

I'm still in that country till legal problems can be sorted and I can go home, but when I go home I may go to jail.. I got a full time job in a major international corporation and within 2 months have been number 1 out of 100 plus people and first in line for a promotion.. I have also started studying again through the university back home and have finished the first semester of my degree..

I haven't seen my kids in over a year and a half..

I've have a beer or 2 once a week or so..

But I still to this day can't stop thinking about taking drugs and am scared that even now after 1.5 years without sticking a needle in my arm I'll go back to it when I get back.. I don't know what to do, I saw a big psychiatrist here and he was useless.. I try to go to NA meeting but haven't been in a couple months due to excessive work load..

what should I do?

Thanks for your reply mate!. Wow, 5 years is a while, but it's already 1.5 years down I guess..

Just another question though, what do you think about involuntary admission to treatment centers for substance abuse? Should western countries think about it?.. everytime I was sectioned or taken to a hospital I'd pretend I was fine and there was nothing anyone could do about it.. if I'm honest, I'd probably be dead if it didn't happen to me when it did..

I really appreciate that.. I really do..

I suppose I should mention that before my 6 year roller coaster ride I had a 90k/y gov job, no record, was half way through a degree and married with kids.. when the divorce happened and my kids were taken away was when the ride started.. Of course it's no excuse but I only mention it because if I had done what you say and sought help or even just someone to talk to things may not have gotten so bad, who knows..

And, finding support this far away from home is hard due to language/cultural barriers, I can't tell anyone at work or the few friends I have, so really, I only have the net..