GRRRRWL

Star Trek: First base

Obligatory Chris McDonald story from some guy on Reddit 3 years ago...

Bit of a long story but here goes...I'm living in NYC for the summer in 2008. It's not my place at all but I'm there for training. My corporate housing is across from Rockefeller Center where every morning at 5:45 they do a soundcheck for whatever terrible performer will be performing the next morning on the Today Show which is the world's worst alarm clock. I actually remember this particular Friday because Miley Cyrus was going to be the performer and the little girls screamed the whole night through. Anyway, I'm exhausted. Long day at work working for an Investment Bank, getting screamed at for missing footnotes etc etc. Buddy from Australia says, "hey let's go out, get laid, whatever blah blah We OWN NYC I'm CAPTAIN AUSTRALIA DOUCHEBAG INVESTMENT BANKING HERO!" ...So that night we go out, I watch him hit on some chicks, eventually leaving me for some art-chick who was telling us stories about how her fiancee just recently died (which, as an aside, is the absolute most bizarre way to say you are down to fuck that I have ever seen...yet kind of a turn on). At this point, I am alone in my least favorite city, it's at least 3am and I need to get from one end of town to the other. Being drunk as shit, I decide I'll walk through Times Square and go to the strip club. Alone, mind you. So I go and it is just soo fucking depressing. I wind up begging this New Zealand / New Jersey woman to come home with me - I even offer to walk her to her car. Her response was some version of, "I don't think you should be here." Totally dejected I wander off to find the rasta folks who scam people on the east side of times square (it was 49th street maybe) because, hey shit oregano is better than nothing, right? I come around the corner and I think I hear them in a little alcove / doorway, so I peak my head around the corner and I shit you not Shooter MothaFuckin McGavin looks up from making out with some mega-skank to tell me, "Hey pal, Get the fuck out of here or I'll fuck you up." I do not respond only to take a step back and give him the biggest, loudest, double-armed-handgunned "SHOOOOOOOOOOOTER!" and walk off. His woman is peeing in laughter. Best night of my life.

Edit: Link: http://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/wiffe/we_met_this_guy_at_the_bar_last_night_and_he/