EveryCountry

Iran. Because it was NOTHING like what I was expecting it to be. Friendliest country in the world by a mile.

Iran!! So, so friendly it was delightful. Here's a story I like to tell (I took this from an interview I did for British Airways):

I was on an overnight bus in Iran, from Shiraz to Khorramshahr. I was sitting behind this elderly woman and she was speaking on her phone in Farsi. She turned around and passed me her phone. It was her grandson, who spoke perfect English and he said ‘You’re sitting behind my grandmother and she’s asked me to tell you she’s worried about you. The bus gets in very early and she’s concerned that you won’t have anyone to make you breakfast, so she’s asking if you will go to her home and she will feed you’. Did I go? Of course. She laid out a thick tablecloth on the floor, we sat on cushions. Breakfast consisted of flatbread, eggs, jam and spices.

Not really... only when a representative of the British Embassy in Congo came to visit me in my holding cell and made it quite clear that if I didn't stop shouting and kicking the door the police might, erm, "make it look like an accident".

That proper freaked me out.

Yes, but I am ginger. God gives with one hand, takes with the other.

Cape Verde thought I was a people smuggler. Congo thought I was a spy. Silly Congo.