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EvaGrayInTheGrave2 karma

Hello, my boyfriend chews at his finger tips. Like pulling skin off until its painful and bleeding kind of picking. He only ever does it that badly when he's playing video games (a big hobby and passion of his he takes great pride and fun from). I'll even mention to him to stop whenever he gets going but he almost instantly puts his finger back in his mouth. He doesn't like it and is self conscious about his fingers.

I wonder what this could be exactly and if I could be doing something more effective than just bringing his attention more to his fingers instead of the game he's lost in?

EvaGrayInTheGrave2 karma

Hello, so I should start by saying I grew up poor and am still without a lot of money. It's never been in the books to see a doctor about my mental health. But I do believe I have depressions and anxiety. From about age 15 or 16 to age 19, I was extremely depressed and anxious. It was a serious issue that my family member ignored and let me sit and suffer through alone. I had to force myself to get my feet back under me if I wanted to feel better. It took years and some persuasion from my grandmother who was the only one trying to help me. I'd be dead if it wasn't for her.

Now I'm 22 and the depression isn't a problem as long as I keep a healthy routine, break it and I spiral and that's super great, but the anxiety hasn't been as manageable and it does make a lot of things difficult.

Recently the thing I'm struggling with most is my boyfriend being away. He's my first relationship (ik, at 22 right? But I found it pretty common within my friend group so there's that) and we've been dating for 6 months now.

His family lives pretty far away, and every time he takes a trip to visit, I don't do well. A few days ago, he left to see his dad who works to put up huge electrical poles in the middle of nowhere.

My boyfriend is really patient with me and made it clear that I could ask him to stay, but I wasn't about to dictate what he does. It's been 4 days since he left, and I haven't gone a single day without crying or shaking and I can't get any work done. His dad has even offered him a job which means he could be gone for 2 months in the middle if nowhere finishing this work contract with his dad.

Even writing it down, I can't freaking breath. Any advice would be great.