DrJeffSzymanski

We have a great blog on this topic here: https://iocdf.org/blog/2017/10/03/help-seperate-ocd-myths-from-the-facts/

That said, the most problematic myth faced by those in the OCD community is that anyone can be a "little OCD". This is perpetuated by media representations of OCD, but also the general misunderstanding of OCD as a personality quirk. The problem lies with our use of the words obsession and compulsive. In general lay language "being obsessed" means something different from experiencing an "obsession". I might be obsessed about my team winning the World Series, but this is very different from experiencing an obsession that myself or someone I care about may get sick and die. Similarly, I might be compulsive about cleaning my office, but that is different that being completely overwhelmed by anxiety and feeling the only way to get relief is to engage in behaviors that are time consuming and get in the way of valued activities.

1) When you truly accept that uncertainty is a part of living then it will become easier. I'm not particularly certain of anything I do, but I choose to do it anyway. My value is to move forward and engage in the world despite my uncertainty. Now, when you have OCD the volume on your uncertainty channel is even louder. Which is why practicing behaving in the world even when you are uncertain can be one of the most important lessons you can learn (and is the core of any effective treatment for OCD). 2) Estimates are that the time between onset of OCD symptoms and effective treatment is 14-17 years! That is completely unacceptable. We currently have over 1,400 self described OCD therapists on our website. But even then you have to sift through and look at their backgrounds to ensure that they understand how to do exposure and response prevention therapy or properly prescribe OCD medication. We have an entire training program devoted to getting more therapists trained: https://iocdf.org/professionals/training-institute/

3) The obsessions aren't memorable. The intense suffering and the lengths to which people lose their lives to this disorder are. Many people think their obsession is more bizarre or rare than others. This misses the point. The core of the treatment is that we all have "weird" or "strange" thoughts. But thoughts are just thoughts. Again, this is a core of effective treatment.

For those in our audience who may not be familiar with this term, Pure O refers to individuals who primarily experience unwanted and intrusive thoughts of violence, sex, or blasphemy. For many with these types of obsessions they way they respond is with an internal (unseen) compulsion like praying, counting, or "neutralizing".

To respond specifically to your request the most important thing you can do is to be supportive, get yourself educated and encourage him to get educated also. We have a lot of information on our website about intrusive violent and sexual thoughts and we have a lot of information at our Annual OCD Conference about these topics. I always recommend the book, "Imp of the Mind" by Lee Baer. For someone to see and read that others are experiencing something similar can be very helpful. I would encourage you both to try to become more involved in the IOCDF (if you aren't already!) as this community is very welcoming and supportive and can cut down the isolation experienced by so many people affected by OCD.

People believe that individuals with OCD want to engage in these behaviors. This couldn't be the furthest from the truth. Individuals with OCD feel they have no choice but to engage in these behaviors as a way to reduce their anxiety. People who are "compulsive" like and enjoy the time they spend organizing and rearranging things. It is the difference between wanting to do something and feeling that you have to do it "or else".

I'm not sure what people would think about that. I definitely think it is problematic that "obsession" and "compulsion" have very different meanings in lay language and in the context of OCD. There always seem to be myths and misconceptions about mental illness anyway though. I don't know if the community of those with bipolar illness experienced anything fundamentally different when the name was changed from manic depression. I think the larger issue is that people are not well educated about what mental illness is in general. The better we are at fighting stigma, educating and raising awareness, the better off the whole community will be.