Chiron-Art-Therapy

Art therapy is great for perfectionism because we are so quick to judge ourselves. In art therapy I do a couple of things with clients to work on perfectionism. Here are some examples:

1. We make UGLY art. If the goal is to make an ugly mess, how can you go wrong?
2. I often encourage people in art therapy to set the intention that "there is no wrong or right way to do this. anything goes"
3. Can we accept what is and use it as a way to learn rather than think of it as failure. I love Angela Duckworth's book Grit where she talks about having an attitude of learning and using falling short of the goal as "practice" and part of the learning process.
4. We also try to work on self-compassion. How would you encourage a niece/nephew, child, or your best friend? Try that with yourself too.

I find that when that's the case, it's an issue of self-criticism or perfectionism. I stick with the process of what's going on in my client's head. "What are you thinking, and how does this crop up in other parts of your life?" The art is a mirror for the rest of life, which is what makes it therapeutic. In the process of making art we start to get more comfortable with the uncomfortable inner world and it starts to get easier.

On another note, I find that as an artist, the gap between what I can think up in my head and what I'm able to actually produce is a tension I have to make peace with.

I have found that feeling not good enough comes from a couple of different places. Often, people had a critical person in their life growing up and they have internalized this person's criticism as part of themselves. Often in art therapy, I do inner child work with my clients so that they can be the "good enough parent" for themselves. I provide an encouraging environment for them to work on building their confidence and feelings of self-worth. Then we make a doll that represents their inner child. What does a child need? Hugs, encouragement, words of love, feeling safe and cared for, and feeling seen. In making and working with the doll that nagging, gaping feeling starts to feel nourished.

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the other way to look at it is having really big dreams, goals, and a sense of destiny. This happens for a lot of intelligent, gifted, or ambitious people. I recommend the book the Gap and the Gain that talks about measuring yourself from what you've accomplished and where you've come from rather than measuring your present against some sort of imagined ideal.

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Progress not perfection!

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I hope this makes sense.

yes, yay for therapy. I've worked with clients with very similar concerns. We do things like, breathing meditations with paint. I have a video example of me demonstrating it here: https://youtu.be/XLpDTAou6u0

Here's the thing. you wouldn't be battling me. I'm not a teacher and I don't give grades. The perception of the judgement is internal. That battle is within you.

The art would not be what you would normally define as art. It would be more about self-compassion work and acceptance rather than making anything.

I like Buddha Boards for this too. the image you made disappears in a few seconds and you start again. Nothing is permanent.

We live in world where we are tested on everything in school which is absurd. What would happen when there isn't a right answer, or an expectation for performance?

One of my favorite quotes is, "Good art is not what it looks like, but what it does to us." by Roy Adzak.

Is ugly art something that would offend my mother? or ugly art something that make me respond with "gross!". There's not "right" answer to that.

Thank you for exploring this with me.

As a person with big aspirations I can relate. I recommend Hal Elrod's book the Miracle morning and his podcast, Achieve your Goals. He is great about helping you keep your attention daily, weekly, and monthly on how you are making progress and for checking in to see if the goals you set are achievable and what you really want.

I also want to add there that sometimes what my ego thinks I should want is not aligned with being a balanced person and that can lead to me beating myself up and working myself to death. Sometimes you have to find a balance too and keep in mind the long term perspective. I often ask myself, "am I rested" and "did I play today."