ChimneyJones

We did a Harlem Shake video in top hats and tails, but I'm sorry to say that was stateside.

Why does my chimney sweep try to upsell me new brick work? I just want the $59 sweep. It only takes them 15 minutes

Great question! A couple of factors are/may be at work:

1. No chimney sweep is making money cleaning chimneys for $59 each. Consider the fact that they had to:
   

• advertise to get you to call or email them

• answer (or pay someone to answer)

• manage a schedule and the logistics of driving to people's homes

and only then can they spend "15 minutes" at your home.

Two: While that could be said of any chimney sweep, two things you mentioned lead me to believe these are not people you want in your home. Actually, three:

• I don't know of any certified chimney sweeps that do $59 sweeps. The legitimate figures in the industry basically do sweeps at cost and make a profit when they do repair jobs. Anyone doing sweeps at $59 either figured out some magical, secret ways of avoiding the costs all legitimate businesses have and/or plan to make up their big losses on sweeps somewhere else. Perhaps by persuading you to do repairs you may or may not need at (possibly) inflated pricing. That being said, a lot of chimney companies will offer steep discounts in the Spring and early Summer because they are losing money anyway depending on how many year-round staff they have.

• It is very unlikely that they completed the annual inspection recommended by the NFPA and every single legitimate professional in the industry. They probably just looked long enough to find something they could sell you on.

• Finally, if you don't know why they are trying to convince you to have work done, chances are you don't need it. A reputable professional can show you pictures of any affected areas of your fireplace/chimney and explain exactly what is going on.

Edit: [serious]

Nope, they're all well-fed - see?

Oh and I try not to show it, but it irks me a bit when people say "chimbley", "chimalee", "chiminey" and so forth.

EDIT Just listened to the song and yeah, sometimes we get widows and housewives wanting to fulfill a Dick Van Dyke fantasy.

Respirators and minimizing exposed skin while working directly near creosote. We also use vacuums designed specifically for the ultra-fine particles we encounter.

Edit: I see what you're after - It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets cancer.