Bakelitebetty

Hah. I have no idea how to answer that. It's just who is am, I suppose.

I certainly have my moments, and lord knows I have random emo days because of the chemo (I dropped my keys and cried for 20 minutes one day last week) but mostly i just crack jokes and make smartass remarks and remember how lucky I am to be loved and taken care of by friends and family, and how much next summer's gonna RULE.

I do, and he's been very supportive, sweet, and caring. He's been with me to two of my four treatments (my mom came to the other two) and has been ready and willing to ferry me to the hospital on short notice a couple of times.

That said, he'll totally call me on it if I'm feeling too sorry for myself :)

Not many, but then again, it doesn't take many.

I have no idea how to translate to booby-lovin' man-speak! I mean, most boobie-lovin' dudes would probably be pretty sad about the girls going away. For me, it's weird. I thought I'd miss them more, but really I just kind of look.. Normal now. And I feel really good about how I look. (Note: I have temporary implants-expanders-in, so at this point I'm a full C, which is where I'm going to stay). I don't think testicles would be a perfect comparison, because while there's certainly the emotional involvement, testicles aren't as huge a part of how the outside world sees you, which colors your own self-perception more than we'd like to believe. Edit: just re-read your question. Duh. You already addressed this. I'll chalk it up to chemo-brain, which, by the way, is a good excuse for all kinds of stuff.

I am going way, way smaller. Like, "average" size. And it's so goddamn nice to have things fit everywhere. I'm pretty slender, so.. Yeah. It'll sure as hell make running easier.

No phantom boob syndrome, but I have had phantom nipples where I felt them get hard in a cold grocery store before I realized they aren't there anymore. I wonder what phantom testicles would feel like? Are guys aware of them squeezing up against your body when it gets cold?

I found a lump in my breast when I was lying around idly feeling myself up. It was actually quite large, but I couldn't feel it when I stood up no matter how I moved my arm around because of where it was situated. After that it was mammogram/ultrasound/biopsy pretty much immediately.