AnesthetizedStudent

Dude, I'd just like to say thank you. Seriously. We often forget the humiliation and indignity that is suffered at our hands by our patients. Usually not intentionally, but as a necessary side product of getting the work of the service done. Thank you for having a sense of humility, self-deprecation, and perspective on your disease, your course, and your damned doctors who round outside of your door before talking to you. Thank you. And thank you for sharing your story in a way so many can follow along.

I'm a PGY3 anesthesia resident (we're weirdos and call ourselves CA2s), and that count backwards from 10 thing is a neat trick, huh? It's great, and it works well on non-popstars when administered by non-cardiologists.

And dilaudid. You can now say someone gave you the D. Did you by chance get an epidural or did you have contraindications to it not listed in your post? If you aren't coagulopathic (iatrogenically or otherwise), you may consider it before your next laparotomy if it's applicable. Clinical correlation required.

It can be. There is a weird billing deal that says basically it can only be run at the end of a case or they can't bill for it (it ends up being counted as the primary anesthetic instead of the general) but if you aren't on anticoagulants, don't have evidence of coagulopathy/thrombocytopenia, don't have a history of coagulopathy, don't have weird back anatomy or hardware, and are interested, it can be helpful. I don't have any studies to point to off hand, but I believe it helps people mobilize post-op. They cut down on the IV narcotics used (because we administer them into the epidural space and does some funny things to their kinetics but I'm positive you don't care about that) but it's to control you pain, get you up and moving, and using the IS. Doctor, you did use the IS, right? The biggest downside is that you get a foley for the duration of catheter placement. At least at our place. But we place them immediately preop for cases with the intention of turning them on at the end or in PACU for post-op pain control.

Edit - not medical advice, just a thought you should ask your docs about when your next operation rolls around

Yes, my husband can tickle my feet but I can't move them.

With great power comes great responsibility.

I'd argue that OP is based on pressure applied to soft tissues of the lower extremity going distal to proximal with the pressure. It may not be a ton, but it is "pushing blood toward the heart from the feet." In a manner similar to the way intermittent pneumatic compression devices work, and I'd bet that many of the same physiologic mechanisms are at play in massage as with IPC devices, i.e. release of endogenous vasodilators.

Edit - To clarify I was merely talking about returning blood to heart, not about whether erection is parasympathetic ally mediated. (It is.)

Source: It'll be Dr. AnesthetizedStudent soon.

Weird curvy edges and all of that. Wait, are you undergoing some experimental treatments administered in a shady warehouse place by a dude named Francis? I've seen how this ends, and frankly, you'll be a butterface forever.