Allthehigherground

What's the matter? Somebody steal your sweetroll?

Flat out. What's the most gruesome thing you've seen?

Ooooooooor. Go to jail for the death of your mother when you're born, then when you turn 25 you get free and they say "actually it was the hospitals fault your mother died not your fault that you killed her when you were born" here's $2mil on your 25th bday. Your life is set!!