AIbiTheRacistDragon

It didn't.

I have to give myself major props on this one. If i fucked up the last 5 years I sure as hell made it up with how I handled this. He wasn't home, worked a night shift. Babe told me when I was getting her ready to go to sleep. once she told me everything (and I fought every inch of me to not freak out) I brushed her teeth (harder than I had ever done so), read her a book, sang her a song, put her to bed, and sat down to think. I didn't want to end up without a car in the morning, or messing her night up, I mean, if anyone needed their sleep at the time, it was her. I read up the whole night on who to call, what the steps where, what the law was on that kind of offense, and then... I searched his PC, found CP, and convinced myself even more that what I was doing was right.

I calmed my nerves, thought out my plan, and slept. 4 hours I slept. I still can't believe I actually slept. I woke up about an hour and a half before he got home, got the babe up, readied her and was at the front waiting by the time he got home. Said good morning, we'll talk when I get home, and drove off to take her to daycare. On my way back, however, I called the police, who where waiting at my house by the time I got there. They knocked, he opened, they explained the situation and he went calmly. I wasn't even there, though, I was in my car atm, in hysterics. The last I saw of him was when he said good morning as he went in the house.

http://i.imgur.com/oOdTdwW.jpg

She woke up in the middle of one of his... episodes. I say it like that because, well... it is what it is. A mental illness. He is very well aware that what he's done is horrible and hates himself for it, just like a cutter, or someone with bulimia. But I digress... Yes, he's in prison. Our state doesn't even let someone get bail once they're charged with sexual battery on a child. So he will be there for a long time.

Thank you for your question. Glad to be able to rationalize all of this.

... this is the hardest one to answer, because ideally, and really anyone that goes through this will tell you this, I never saw it coming. However that couldn't be farther from the truth.

We got together in 2005, married in 08, but I had absolutely no idea of any of his problems till, maybe 09, when our daughter was born. However they where pretty obvious once they came to light. To be truly, truly open I have to admit he was never the kind of person to open up or talk about his childhood, but his parents had a very abusive marriage so I kind of brushed that off as him blocking painful memories.

He had cheated on me before we got married, but it wasn't a big deal to me. We hadn't been with anyone besides each other, so it made sense to me, and it was very easy to brush off. That, however, threw me in the "suspicious wife" territory and I began frantically searching his FB account (well myspace ATT) and his computer whenever I had the chance... and then I found the porn... oh chesus there was so much porn. Filed, categorized... at least 10GB the first time I found it. It was all deleted, but some images bothered me. Hentai, but with little girls, well, that among the rest. He excused it by saying he would torrent whole packs of it. OK... made sense.

Then very creepy behavior started. Taking hidden pictures of women's feet... a folder of about 150 images.... And saving pictures of some of the younger girls i have added on my facebook... then the first time I found CP on his computer... My daughter was not even a year old at the time. He confessed to having a problem then. Begged me to forgive him, that he would seek help. Threatened with suicide. I gave, but not by much. We separated for about a year, and he did get help. It was only therapy, no meds, but it didn't last longer than... oh... 6 months. he did change though. He became a completely different person. Then we moved back in together. About two years passed. I put a key logger in his PC. Still, lots of porn, but nothing weird. So much time passed after that and I became fed up with finding nothing. I thought he was ok.
My daughter, thankfully, has always been very outspoken. When she became aware of something out of the ordinary she immediately told me. Doesn't really know, still, how bad it was. He testified to more when he was arrested and interrogated. It hurts so much to know what he did to her, but it feels so good knowing she only remembers one occasion (she was asleep the other times, heavy sleeper) and will most likely not remember anything, in the future.

TL:DR, there where many, but they don't happen all at once, it gradually builds up. At first you chalk it up to it just being "weird", but when its obvious... well... yeah...

thanks