I am a rape victim from Florida Tech that recently found out my rape was never reported in a federally required report.

After you came out with your story, did the school try to reach out to you to resolve or apologize or anything? I'd like to know if they tried to contact you.

Nope

First, I am really sorry for you. I hope you get better soon, and hope this guy gets to prison.
Was the rapist caught? has there been a trial? If not - is there a chance he will be judged or he just got away with it?

Will you sue the college for both the cover-up of the crime in statistics and for the lack of security on its grounds?

I personally think that every student who got into this college in the years when they "forgot" to publish truthful stats must get all their payments back because knowing how many crimes happen on this ground influences the choice of a college, too. And the only (!) thing colleges understand in our days is losing money (sorrowfully).

I addressed the justice aspect in another comment. To summarize, I didn’t press charges. I was 17 and mentally could not handle it. I wish I had.

We’re considering a class action lawsuit. Nothing is set in stone yet, I want to make sure we are mentally able to go through with it. I care about these girls. If the other victims want in on it, I’d love that. We are powerful in numbers. But having the news post your story, even anonymously, can be a huge stress. I want them to be able to cope with all of it. The lawsuit can wait until anyone that wants to go for it is in the right headspace, but I definitely want it to happen.

I’ve actually talked to a mother of a student starting next fall. She’s really worried because of this. I agree all the money should go back, but that’ll never happen. College is a hell hole. They’ll get their due when it’s determined how large their fines will be. It’s going to be in the millions, no doubt. For the mother, I gave her my personal number to pass to her daughter. My fiancé is still in school (I transferred to an online university) so we will be nearby for a while. I told her to call me if she ever feels she’s in trouble, no matter the time. I can’t prevent a bad situation from happening, but I’ll do what I can to end it as soon as possible. Always.

I know where you were coming from though when you didn't press charges. My biological father molested me when I was a toddler. My mother fought huge custody battles in court to keep him from me and I'm glad our whole family rallied around us to make sure I never had to see him again. One of my aunts in the 80s was one of those hardcore punk rocker chicks and while she looks a little more formal these days, she hasn't lost her blunt in your face mannerisms LOL. She would run into this fucker at a store somewhere and loudly be all "Sicko! Freak! Fucking child rapist! You are a sick fuck! Sick fuck!" And just publicly shame him into leaving for his car any time she ran into him anywhere. My grandfather took an even crazier turn. He was one of those angry redneck Texan types you really don't want to piss off. He drove around with a few guns in his van and if he ran into him, he was dead set on killing the motherfucker until one of the neighbors at the business they ran out of that industrial lot called the cops on him because he didn't want to see him ruin his life murdering the fucker. But damn, I can honestly say I had someone willing to kill a motherfucker for me at one point. There were plans in place to run off with me out of state with some other family members if the custody battles didn't go well, but luckily he lost his visitation rights and I've never had to see this son of a bitch again. Last form of contact I ever got was maybe 15 years ago or so, some random document was mailed to me. Apparently he changed his will in order to specifically call me out as not being a beneficiary of anything despite being his son. Fine by me, I don't want any of his shit. Just continue to fuck off and stay out of my life, or else I'll curb stomp your goddamn head in the second I see you.

But we decided when I was that young (about 3 years old when it happened) that we didn't want to pursue him criminally at that time and dredge it all up and put me through that. I've largely put it all behind me now and rarely really even think about it until I run across the topic, to be honest. And it still pisses me off in one way, yet in another it was so far back in my childhood and I've moved on and done so much since then that I'm also past it. So I can at least offer that much solace to you. Do what you need to do to get your closure and resolve it for yourself. I guess for me and my family, our big win was just getting my biological father's visitation and custody rights taken away from him so he could no longer even be a part of my life. I think you might have it a little harder than me, I mean I was so young and you were a lot older in your incident. But, I can at least offer you that there will come a day when you find for the most part life goes on and you're able to keep on keeping on and this won't even really come up to haunt you until the topic gets brought up, if that helps.

Thank you for taking the time to share your story. I’m sorry it happened to you and I am so glad you have your family. They’re absolutely inspiring. I don’t believe our rapes were harder or easier than each other. We both went through something traumatic that we shouldn’t have and we have to live with it. I hope you’re doing great & continue to live the life you want and you DESERVE. I’ll always be in your corner if you need it

You sound like a wonderful person. I'm sorry you experienced what you did, as well as the other young women. I'm a survivor or rape myself, and I also was young at the time and didn't press charges. I know how life altering it can be. At the very least the school should have to pay for any related mental health counseling you and the others require for the rest of your lives. I'd hope they'd have to pay a lot more than that, but it'd be a start. Until such a time I highly recommend organizations like RAINN; in my experience they're really wonderful. I didn't seek counselling until years later, but it turned out to be a positive experience for me.

I wish you and the other unnamed women nothing but the best. I sincerely hope you get the justice and compensation you deserve.

Edit: From your other posts, I also know how debilitating the nightmares/flashbacks can be from the PTSD. I can watch almost anything and not get triggered (I hate the negative connotations that word has started accruing) after all these years... but that one scene in the Hunger Games series where Katniss wakes up from a PTSD nightmare, that left me ugly crying out of nowhere remembering how bad they were. The flashbacks suck, I can be play wrestling with my boyfriend (nothing abusive or anything, just us joking around having fun) and he pinned me and put his knee on my chest and for a second I couldn't breathe (my attacker choked me), sent me right back to that moment. It was something so innocuous and playful and there I was crying, and that just made me feel shittier. He's understanding and everything, wasn't upset with me at all I was just pissed with myself. Try not to get pissed with yourself, its not your fault the human brain is weird and stupid.

Thank you for your kind words. I’ll definitely check out RAINN. I hope you’re healing well and get to live the life you deserve

I'm doing a lot better than I was, I have a great support system! I also have a little parrot that I feel does a lot for my emotional state. He's not trained or anything (hence why I won't call him a support animal) but he makes me happy and his presence is soothing. For me it was a big thing to feel needed, and Piper needs me. I hope your dog is as much a help to you as my bird is to me. Also for more information, if you want to give it to those unnamed women as well. RAINN is completely free (they work on donations) and anonymous. They even have a buzz in system on the doors of the one near me (don't know if they all have this) and wouldn't let my boyfriend in (he tried to enter 5 mins after me because he was smoking a cig) until I confirmed he was with me. They don't let anyone in without an appointment, so people can feel safe and private while they wait. The only people allowed in are staff, individuals seeking counseling, and their support.

You can call him a support animal, service animal would be inappropriate. Emotional support animals need no formal training and have no public access rights. They just make you feel better. I’m glad you have him, animals do so much for us emotionally. I’m definitely gonna let the others know about RAINN

Is it too late to press charges now? Do you know the identity of the other students and have you had the opportunity to speak with them?

She said she had a year to press charges, which sounds fucked up. Too bad, it seems like justice won't be done here (at least not in courts).

That statute of limitations seems short. Maybe she should double check that’s right.

In the state of Florida you have 1 year after filing a report to decide to press charges. If you don’t file a report, you have 15 years from the time of the crime to press charges. Being 17 and legally a minor, I was forced to report.

That just seems so unfair.

I agree. Laws need to be changed. If I’m being forced to report, I shouldn’t have time taken away. If I would’ve kept my mouth shut I’d have a decade and a half. It’s worse for minors that are younger. A 16 year old has to decide before she’s legally an adult if she wants to go through the court process? 15 years should be the limit, reported and not reported.

In FL it looks like there's a pretty wide range of statutes depending on the specifics, but the shortest that I can find is 3 year and it doesn't commence until the victim turns 18. So I'd second OP double checking her info

I’m going off what the police told me. Will definitely recheck that. They were awful, honestly shouldn’t have listened to them

How did you react to finding out that your doctor was required to report the incident to the police and you only had 24 hours to tell your parents? Because that sounds horrifying.

Honestly I cried the entire 45 minute drive to my parents. I was pissed.

That just seems like a breach of the expected confidential nature of a doctor/patient relationship. It should have been your choice to report it. Things like this could lead to people not going to the doctor after an assault.

I’ve never been mad at her. She didn’t realize i was underage until it was too late. She should’ve looked at my file sooner, yes. It was a small mistake with big consequences. She tried to get out of it. She called lawyers she knew and tried to find a loophole. Her hands were tied. I appreciate your comment, and I appreciate her. She made sure I never felt alone through the entire process. She’s a great person, small mistake

Seeing my Alma mater on reddit for the first time and it’s this thread. I read all the crimson articles since they were shared by other alums and honestly, you handled it so well. I’m glad the story got out. Even during my time (mid 2000’s) there were hushed conversations and nothing done. One girl on my freshman year attempted suicide due to it. Thank you for helping to bring light to this issue so hopefully real changes are made.

Has the alumni association reached out at all? I’m sure this doesn’t do wonders for the schools reputation.

I am in the same situation (90's alumnus - male). I am pissed and reached out to the Engagement center. As should you. Per the person I called, there has been an updated Clery report sent out, and it seems like at least one person may have lost their job (or simply been reassigned - not 100% sure).

Edit: 2 people were terminated and 1 was reassigned.

The “updated” report still doesn’t include me. There’s still a 0 under statutory rape. Also, I know 3 other victims who have reported their crimes within the last 3 years. McCay sent an email stating there were 8 rape victims that should be listed on the report. 4 out of 8 victims are speaking about their rape? It feels unlikely to me. Given that a lot of victims would rather keep it to themselves, 50% is much too high for 8 to be accurate. I may be wrong, but that’s what I’m thinking currently.

Fellow alum, female, mid 2010s. This is absolutely horrifying but unfortunately doesn’t surprise me. After the precious football team started the rape allegations and payoffs became pretty well known and myself and my friends saw exactly how we could expect the school to treat survivors.

The football team royalty is real. I know more than one person harmed by members of the football team and mistreated by Florida Tech in the aftermath. I'm thankful for the Crimson bringing up this story and for the survivors' bravery.

Female FIT Alumni here (early 2010's) and hearing this is f****** horrifying. Nobody at the school wanted the football team (the money would have been better off going to replacing lab equipment) so to hear that this is now happening is infuriating. I remember when they were just recruiting people to play and three potential players got booted after getting caught cheating on the MOST BASIC MATH CLASS THE SCHOOL OFFERED. Now they're excusing even worse behavior? Legitimately ashamed of my alma mater.

Wow, 4 alums in one post. I knew this would reach a lot of people but I’m in awe of how many went to, go to, or live near the school. This is crazy. Thank you for taking time to comment. And, obviously, I agree with everything you’ve said. The schools headed for the shitter. And McCay’s email blasts are not helping anything.

What does the service dog do for you?

I have PTSD which causes flash backs, night terrors, panic attacks, the works. He’s currently in training so he’s not fully ready for public access but he’s learning deep pressure therapy to get me out of attacks. I tend to space out and have flash backs so we’re working on nudging (stepping on me, hitting my hand, head on face) to get me to come back to reality. We wanted to do something to help with the nightmares, like nudging me to wake up, but he’s a deeper sleeper than I am so that was scrapped real fast lol

Has EMDR therapy been something you've considered or know much about? It helped a lot with my ptsd

I’ve never heard of it but I’ll definitely look into it. I’m not against anything

Really interested to know what you'd like other people to understand or be aware of regarding this situation. What would you like other people to know and what would help you for other people to communicate back to you that they know?

I want people to be aware what Florida tech did. This isn’t an oversight. This isn’t an error in date. This is a blatant disregard for victims of rape on campus. They’d much rather act like we don’t exist. Pretend they’re a safe school. There should be outrage & demand for a change. Personally, I’ve wanted the title 9 coordinator to be fired and the president to step down. Title 9 coordinator was reassigned, which while shitty, is a change. Now McCay should leave.

I know this is likely to get drowned out but I highly recommend you read Rachael Denhollander's book What Is a Girl Worth? My Story of Breaking the Silence and Exposing the Truth about Larry Nassar and USA Gymnastics. It's an incredible book and I think it can also help you feel stronger in the face of what's to come.

I’m at work so I screenshotted your comment. I’ll find the book when I get out of here. Thank you ❤️

Why did you pick such a username?

I’ve said it multiple times and boy I’ll gladly say it again lol. The name started when I was 15. I used a variation on league of legends and it stuck with me. I genuinely enjoy the name and I think it’s funny.

How much (if any) therapy have you gone through? Has it helped? Are you suffering from PTSD?

I’ve been diagnosed with PTSD. currently I’m taking 20mg of Paxil daily for it and have Xanax on hand for when I need it, although I try to avoid it when possible as I hate how Xanax makes me feel. I went into CAPS, the counseling service offered at my school, the day I reported my rape to my doctor. All they went over was coping skills listed on a paper they hand out to everyone and made a plan incase I seriously thought I’d attempt suicide (I dealt with suicidal thoughts for weeks but could never see myself actually following through). I hated it. I went to a psychiatrist that had his own practice and visited the school often and he’s the one that messed with my meds until I stopped wanting to die. I took a break from February 2019 to October 2019 from counseling. I should not have done that. My grades slipped, I stopped eating as much as possible (my now fiancé would sneak into my dorm and either bring me food or get me to go out with him), and honestly I just got really mad at everything. I started seeing a new psychologist and she’s absolutely wonderful. I see improvements that I’ve needed for a while now. However, I will be seeking a new psychologist soon as it’s over an hour drive to get to her and I can’t handle the long drives anymore since I was in two accidents recently. While they weren’t my fault they messed up my head and the drive makes me nauseous. I definitely still need help and still want the help.

I'm very sorry. I know words can't help in times like these, but I still offer my condolences. I hope things get better for you. Has the perpetrator been brought to justice?

As I was 17, I didn’t want to press charges. I waited a couple weeks to go to my doctor. I only went because the anxiety of STDs was consuming every minute of my day. I asked if she had to report if I told her something happened and she said no. I spilled the beans and THEN she looked at my chart and saw my age. I was about a week away from my 18th birthday. She had to tell. She gave me a day to tell my parents so the cops wouldn’t. I didn’t want them to know. I thought my dad would be mad (he wasn’t). After being forced to tell my parents, all I could think about was his mom. He was from up north, over 1000 miles away. I thought about her getting that call, that her college freshman had been arrested for rape. I couldn’t handle it. If I’d had the maturity and the knowledge I do now, I would’ve pressed charges. But I didn’t. Legally, I was still a kid. I only had a year to change my mind and all I wanted to do was forget. Not pressing charges may be one of my biggest regrets.

Although, there is some form of justice. I’ve told everyone I know at our school his name. I won’t post it online since there’s absolutely no proof to back up my claim and it can be considered slander. But I’ve told a lot of people and told them they can tell others. I want to make sure he doesn’t hurt another girl. I’m a very social person and I get on well with a lot of students. I haven’t been shy about telling my story and asking them to warn others. One guy on the row team offered to handle it for me. While I love vigilante justice, I felt that was too far as he could punt him across campus without trying. I’m going to continue to speak to other students and let them know who raped me so they can protect themselves and their friends and their friends friends. It’s all I can do to him now

Important question.

Is the School required to report any alleged crime, or only all proven crimes?

I’ve been told by someone who’s been reading through the Clery Act for a year now that it’s prosecuted crimes, unprosecuted crimes, AND unfounded crimes. Everything

Does the rapist know that he raped you (if you didn’t realize it yourself for several months)? Was he a stranger or a friend? Did you communicate with them afterwards? Thank you by the way, this post is brave:)

I really don’t know if he knows. He only texted me once after the rape and that was to ask me to sleep with his friend. I told him he was disgusting and he never texted me again. He was a stranger. We’d met that day.

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There’s a detailed post on my page. It took me weeks, not months. I always thought of rape as a stranger jumping out of a bush or holding a weapon to a girls head. We’d had a nice night. I wanted to sleep with him. But then it got really out of hand. I couldn’t comprehend why he’d want to hurt me when I was already interested in him. What was the point?

I live right around the corner from Florida Tech, I had no idea that this was going on! I'm so incredibly sorry that this happened to you. Is there anything I can do, as a member of the community, to help you and and the other victims?

Edit: When I was in college, something similar happened on my campus. There were significant protests, letter-writing campaigns, sit-ins, etc. I know that there's power in numbers and that creating awareness is a huge part of it, which is where my question is coming from.

People like you are why I shared all of this. I want the community to know. Share with others, create outrage. While I want Florida tech to pay, financially and socially, for their negligence, I mostly want to keep parents informed. They need to know what they’re sending their kid to

As someone who has considered going to this university (I am female), would you still recommend going after all of this? Or is it better just not attend the college due to serious problems like this.

Personally, I have a huge problem with Melbourne PD. I was 17 when I reported so I was in the room with my mom, my doctor, a Sargent, and a new cop. The Sargent told me if I didn’t give him the name of my rapist it would be my fault if he raped again. I was terrified already and he knew I was scared and decided instead of speaking to me like an equal he’d try to strong arm me into doing what he wanted. I did not give them name. The new cop took my ID to get my information, saw it was 2 days until my birthday and decided to say “oh happy birthday”. Not nearly as big of a problem as the Sargent but what the fuck? You’re taking a rape report and now is the time for birthday wishes? Also, they never offered me a female officer. They’re suppose to and they didn’t. If Florida tech is your dream school, pursue it. It’s a great school academically. I was in the forensic psychology program and my professors were absolutely amazing. I can’t list a single grievance against the psychology department and my fiancé studied something else (won’t say, trying to shield his identity) and he never complained. If you decide to come to Florida tech, message me privately. I’d like to stay in contact. I’ll be living around here for a while. If you ever need anything, I want you to be able to contact me. Day or night, I’ll get you out of any situation you’re uncomfortable with. We have to stick together and I will ALWAYS have your back.

I'm sorry this happened to you.

What made you settle on that username?

I’ve been waiting for the username questions lol. When I was 15 I made a league of legends account and all my usual usernames were taken. So I decided on a variation of this one. It’s been my go-to ever since.

Do you still play league?

Yes I do lol but I’m absolute trash

lol boobtouch69 (I'll always be a child)

What do you think gave you the strength to come forward? Both in general, and publicly I mean. I've heard of too many cases that go unmentioned, or at least aren't not to authorities. I'm curious if you think it was just your personality, a support system you have in place, or whatever it may be.

Definitely my support system. After knowing my parents had my back and meeting my now fiancé, I feel so much stronger. They’re my rock and I couldn’t do this without them

Is it too late to press charges against your rapist? Would you even want to if it isn’t too late?

As far as I know, it’s too late. The police told me I had one year and that time is up. I’m going to do my own research soon. I’d strongly consider it, although I’m sure it wouldn’t amount to much. I have no physical proof as I didn’t do a rape kit. I was scared and wanted to act like nothing happened so I wouldn’t have to tell my parents.

Some of the articles mention some incidents involving transgendered individuals. Is that related to the rape incident in any way?

It’s another crime that wasn’t reported. She was the victim of a hate crime and, like the rape victims, Florida Tech decided to erase her experience and not report it.

Why is no one reporting anything to the police instead of totally untrained University professors? I don't know what can be done if step 1, reporting to authorities, isn't done. I don't see how universities are really even involved more than removing the convicted.

We have reported to authorities. Every victim that’s come forward has had to prove their legit, which means police reports. The problem is the school is required to report the statistics of every crime that occurs on their campus in a 3 year span. They neglected to report over 40 crimes. This is all explained in the articles. You don’t have to read them all to get the info, and fox 35 is a video if that’s easier. We are angry that the school tried to act as though we didn’t exist in a federally required report. Not that we went to untrained professionals for justice.

Do you feel like this makes college more of a scam?

Oh absolutely. Especially as a private college.

Why didn’t you file suit?

I’ve answered that in another comment. To summarize, I couldn’t mentally handle it. I feel I was too young to have to make a decision like that.

Does this have anything to do with the guy who did an AMA the other day talking about Florida (big shock) deputy's not filing rapes?

That was in Tampa, across the state. Unrelated

If you actually get raped by someone , you report it immediately. Otherwise it will always be he said she said. Without proof can’t do much. Also don’t go to the university, go to the police..

Did you even read the articles? It appears you didn’t.

Why Florida tech though? Why not DSC? Or a similar college?

I’d already gotten my associates degree from a local community college thanks to dual enrollment. I chose Florida tech since there’s only 3 schools in the state with a forensic psych program and this one was closest to my parents. Had I known then that a psych degree with a law and/or criminal justice minor will do the same thing, UCF would’ve been my original choice. Poor planning

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I was in two car crashes recently and the only way I can describe it is the panic you feel when you watch another car coming towards you. You know it’s gonna happen. You see it happening. There’s nothing you can do to stop it. You’re powerless. Weak. I knew my body and knew it couldn’t take the friction for long. I kept telling him no, stop, and he didn’t. So I just had to wait. Eventually i swelled so much he couldn’t continue and he left. While the act of the rape was painful, for me, it was nothing compared to what came after. It took me weeks to understand that I’d been raped.

Guys, there's no need to ask "what happened? how did it happen?". It might be difficult for OP to talk about it. And the explanation of how it happened is on OP's profile FYI.

I don’t have any issue talking about it, it’s just annoying to repeat myself when it’s right there lol. Thank you for pointing it out