My short bio: So yeah, I was born with this mutation called Macrodactyly which means that I have a big ass toe... That's pretty much it.

My Proof: http://i.imgur.com/UvF7xAp.jpg

EDIT: Alright, that was fun. Seeya

Comments: 253 • Responses: 26  • Date: 

iwantartmoney360 karma

you ever stub that sumbitch?

warriorservant148 karma

I think I've only stubbed it once or twice

Greystoke1337277 karma

Did it destroyed the furniture?

warriorservant241 karma

I mean... not completely

blackmagemasta180 karma

Sooo... what's it like having a fucked up toe?

warriorservant332 karma

Shit's crazy

SoManyNinjas159 karma

Have you considered ballet? I bet you could do a pretty fucking boss pirouette

warriorservant445 karma

This kills the toe

TheHoodRat158 karma

Have you ever gotten freaky with that thing?

edit: my boss is making me ask this... for science

warriorservant130 karma

No... but there's a first time for everything ;)

paulatina8152 karma

Have you ever used it for like, maybe go "hey kids, you want to see what will happen if you don't eat your vegetables?" or something like that?

warriorservant301 karma

I once convinced a few of my friends that I dropped a 30 pound weight on it and that it'll be that swollen for the rest of my life

Capricious_Unicorn111 karma

Corrective surgery or no? And... how do you shoes?

warriorservant100 karma

I haven't gotten any corrective surgery for it yet, but I hope to sometime in the near future. For shoes I just get the size of the bigger foot and wear that on both feet.

arnoldwhat346 karma

Hey OP, if your shoe size is 1.5 sizes different or larger you can get split sizes at Nordstrom for no extra charge. I used to work there and not many people knew about it.

You probably already know this, but if you want to make your shoe fit better on your smaller foot you can add extra insoles and a tongue pad. A tongue pad is a piece of felt that goes on the tongue of your shoe and it will push your foot backwards so your heel sits snugly in the back of the shoe. If you need any shoe advice send me a message.

warriorservant179 karma

Oh shit, I did not know that! Thanks man!

toeofcamell36 karma

Probably be easier and less hassle if you just wear flip flops. I don't think anybody will notice

warriorservant47 karma

Nah, I've gone to the beach without any type of footwear before. A lot of people ask about it and stuff, and it's just really awkward for me

toeofcamell58 karma

Have you ever considered dominating the hyper competitive world of toe wrestling? You could go by Tou Ferrigno or Ronnie Toeman

warriorservant63 karma

In honor of the name of the mutation, I think I'd go with "Toeny Macro"

Capricious_Unicorn53 karma

You know, there's a whole large group of people who really really (and I mean really) enjoy... feet.

Has OP ever thought to profit from giant toe?

warriorservant54 karma

I mean, if I was really on tough times, I don't think I'd be against it.

ProofForScience4 karma

is your toe the one the story originated from?

warriorservant2 karma

what story?

thunnus49 karma

I crack my toes. Can you crack that toe?

warriorservant35 karma

I don't think I've ever tried

1017bricksquad00742 karma

Try..... You know, for science

warriorservant78 karma

Nope, won't crack

DarwinianMonkey28 karma

Has toe ever been a deal breaker? You know...for a sexual encounter?

warriorservant72 karma

Nah, bitches love it

The_Better_brother23 karma

So.....20 duck sized horses or 1 horse sized duck?

warriorservant39 karma

20 duck sized horses, easy

Mate922 karma

In a scale of 1 to 10 how many toe jokes do you suffer from in a daily routine?

warriorservant50 karma

0, but it was a pleasant surprise to receive as many puns as I did when I posted it

cantRYAN22 karma

How does it affect your ability to walk, exercise?

warriorservant37 karma

It's fine when I'm walking, but when I run for long periods it starts to get a bit sore.

boarder98119 karma

How is the other foot?

warriorservant22 karma

It's normal

PepperEPot12 karma

What is the name of the condition?

warriorservant27 karma

Macrodactyly

octabrain9 karma

does that toe have the same muscle function as the other toes? i guess i'm asking if you can straighten it out and curl it up.

Tyzzor8 karma

So .. How do you proceed while buying a new pair of shoes? Do you get one size for your right foot and another for the left or you just poke a hole in the left one?

warriorservant10 karma

I just buy the shoe size that fits the left foot and wear it on both of my feet. Finding shoes that wide can really be a bitch sometimes.

Ennion4 karma

Can you sprint? Is the other foot normal?

warriorservant9 karma

Yeah, I can sprint

and yes, the other one is normal

TwoSonasOneCup3 karma

Do you get custom made shoes, or sandals all the way, are socks avoided like the plague and finally how much control do you have over it?

warriorservant10 karma

Nope, just regular shoes

I wear socks

I have a decent amount of control over it, it's just slightly difficult to move since it has a lot of fat on it

alucard3332 karma

How comfortable/uncomfortable are shoes for you and does it cause pain around your leg? Also does it hinder your movement much?

warriorservant2 karma

Shoes tend to fit tight on my foot, so I have to break them in for a day or 2 for them to be comfortable. It doesn't really cause much pain outside of that, and it doesn't really hinder any movement

t--1 karma

do you feel like you have any advantages over others with that thing?

has it stopped you from getting laid and passing on that gene to your kids?

warriorservant2 karma

Nah, it's never really been a turn-off for an SO, and it also isn't hereditary