I have worked as a stripper/exotic dancer for the past 5 years. Ask me anything. Will submit proof to moderators

Comments: 1136 • Responses: 62  • Date: 

destinedkid17174 karma

Do you see any men you would least expect to be at a strip club? Like a mayor or priest?

tcaviar363 karma

Yes. I have seen a very innocent looking teacher from my high school

destinedkid17153 karma

Wow, did he remember you?

tcaviar133 karma

No he did not, I immediately walked to the dressing room

rammbro131 karma

Have you ever legitimately become attracted to a client? From my experience (which is fairly limited) I've noticed that strippers will "hit on" guys or pretend to be more interested in them to get better tips (there's nothing wrong with that, I understand the business aspect behind it). I'm just curious about how often the interest in clients is genuine and how often it's faked

tcaviar196 karma

Not at all, and yes flirting goes a long way to receive tips or keep a client returning on a weekly basis. If anything being in this industry has made resent men.

KindergartenRedditor41 karma

Are you now a lesbian?

tcaviar142 karma

I wish I were

obxfisher33 karma

You resent men? What kind of men did you think you would be meeting as a stripper? Not being critical, just curious if you were told/thought otherwise? I wouldn't judge all men based on who you meet as a stripper. You're meeting exactly the type of man you would expect in a strip club.

Try meeting men as /u/tcaviar. Might end up a little better. Well, until they can't handle that you're a stripper! :)

tcaviar15 karma

I have come across men of all demographics. As I mentioned earlier, even bumped into a old high school teacher would was so innocent looking and reserved. I have met men who were doctors, and just random drunks who had no class. I have met little grandpas in walkers, and young men who just turned 18

godlyjacob33 karma

But not every doctor or schoolteacher goes to the strip club.

tcaviar5 karma

True

smallstone25 karma

Well, even waitresses can get flirty for a good tip.

tcaviar44 karma

Yes, I have come across waitresses who were literally undercover hookers

RINGxOFxFIRE66 karma

That's terrible! What restaurant were you at? ... So I know to avoid going there.

tcaviar25 karma

Not a restaurant...at a strip club. They would literally meet "sugar daddies" and do extras outside of work for Louboutins, purses, car down payments, rent money, etc.

miss_snarkypants2 karma

I met a stripper once who said that she had to give it up because she'd started to resent men too much, including her own father. "I see daddies like him all the time," she said, and their behavior is all the same.

My SIL was a stripper for several years, but continued to work one day a week as a server at Bob Evans. She said it helped her stay grounded in the real world. OP, would it maybe help to have a second part-time job that isn't stripping?

tcaviar3 karma

I completely agree with that to "stay grounded"

garrettrinpoche106 karma

what's the champagne room REALLY like?

tcaviar206 karma

Sometimes boring and mostly conversation. Other times I have witnessed/overhead more than just a dance. California strip clubs have gone downhill...literally low key brothels. However, in Nevada it is strictly dancing. "Extras" do occur but not as rampant as California clubs.

garrettrinpoche230 karma

and people say legalizing prostitution at brothels where girls are required to get tested and use condoms is the unsafe option...

tcaviar149 karma

Exactly!

daredaki-sama15 karma

Heard on the radio the other day about a guy who got gonorrhea from a hj at a strip club.

tcaviar10 karma

Ew really?

nowitasshole77 karma

If a decent looking guy took you to the champagne room and put $500 on the table, how far would you honestly go?

tcaviar107 karma

Can he look like Ed Westwick?

PlinyPompei25 karma

But Chris Rock said there's no sex in the champagne room. Now I'm confused.

tcaviar9 karma

There is not

sicapat103 karma

What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?

tcaviar37 karma

Not sure

sicapat28 karma

Have you ever been to Canada?

tcaviar35 karma

Once, to visit

sicapat41 karma

cool have you every danced to The Beatles Obladi Oblada? Here it is if you have never heard of the song

Obladi Oblada

tcaviar26 karma

Never

sicapat79 karma

Why isn't the Macho Man Randy Savage in the wrestling Hall of Fame? He was one of the greatest wrestlers but yet he is not even in the hall of fame, whereas people like pete rose and drew carey are in the wrestling hall of fame?

tcaviar29 karma

No idea. Maybe there was a mistake

tcaviar21 karma

I love the Beatles though

diynovice89 karma

What are your long term plans? Do you see stripping as a possible career?

You say the job has made you resent men. Are you in a relationship right now?

tcaviar199 karma

Graduate from university in 2015, get a real job. Stripping is not a long term career. Once a woman goes past her prime, beauty is gone body is aged. However, intelligence is forever. I am currently not in a relationship

diynovice54 karma

Given how your attitudes to men have been shaped by your job, what do you find attractive in a man?

What's the longest relationship you've been in?

tcaviar135 karma

I find an intellectual man attractive. Someone who respects a woman, someone who is generous and is able to view the world in different perspectives. Hygiene and a clean bathroom is sexy. A good fashion sense is a plus.

tcaviar41 karma

Longest relationship 4 years

diynovice27 karma

Was this all while you were a stripper? Or before?

tcaviar40 karma

During

diynovice13 karma

I find an intellectual man attractive. Someone who respects a woman, someone who is generous and is able to view the world in different perspectives. Hygiene and a clean bathroom is sexy. A good fashion sense is a plus.

How closely did this 4-year boyfriend fit that description?

tcaviar102 karma

He was uneducated, street smart but loyal and family oriented. Overtime we began to clash. His views were narrow minded, and only from his perspective. Our conversations became more meaningless. In the end he wasn't respectful. He got physically violent, and that was the last straw. His bathroom was clean though.

FrenchBiscuit68 karma

How much do you typically make per year?

Do you want to get out of the profession?

tcaviar176 karma

It's hard to say I would estimate 50,000-70,000. That is working 2-3 days a week. 5-6 hour shifts. But in context I was able to purchase a new Lexus last year. I also have my own apartment. And still have money saved. Hope that helps

bradwind664 karma

My ex girlfriend was a stripper and what led to our breakup was she got influenced by the other girls and became addicted to cocaine and pills and alcohol which led to her pathologically lying about everything. How prevalent are drugs backstage and have you had a similar experience?

tcaviar51 karma

I am sorry to hear that my dear. That is devastating. I had a long term boyfriend who got hooked on prescription drugs...was not a good outcome. Drugs have been prevalent, especially cocaine and alcohol at a certain club. Luckily I have been strong enough to go to work get in...and get out

RanDeeKaySee49 karma

I have a friend that is a stripper & she once told me about a time where a guy paid her $20 to stomp on his balls, spit in his face & call him a nasty mother fuckers. Have you had any customers with strange requests?

tcaviar37 karma

Yes a gothic man who wanted ball stomping. Also males that were into asphyxiation...didn't want to go in the back with them

VincetheMadMan9 karma

What kind of person gets off on having their balls stomped on?

tcaviar20 karma

A sadomasochist

garrettrinpoche48 karma

ever had a celebrity come in?

tcaviar158 karma

I work in Nevada and California. (In a Southern California strip club) I have seen Travis Barker come in

AlwaysNew245 karma

Worst/Best customer you had?

tcaviar153 karma

Best customer was a giggly Asian in man who would tip me for no apparent reason. He was so upbeat all the time. Worst customer was a man who resembled Santa Claus

AlwaysNew213 karma

What did the Santa did?

tcaviar55 karma

He just annoyed everyone to no end. And was creepy

Massive_Shlong40 karma

I have a very serious question, and please, please, don't be offended by it. You say that this job has made you resent men, but have you ever thought of it from the man's perspective?

I ask this because a girl who I like very much, and wanted to date in the past, has recently become a stripper. However, since she started stripping, her morals and integrity have changed. She is no longer the same woman I once knew, and I could not see myself dating her until she quit her job and took time to heal. She is starting to resent men as well, but that's because the men she deals with all day are men who would go to a strip club and ask for all the perks in the back rooms.

She's not into men like that; she's told me before she's looking for a Christian man, with moral integrity. While I cannot say I'm someone of integrity the way I would like to be, I can at least say I'm not someone who goes to strip clubs because I am afraid of how they would change my views of women and my outlook on others.

So my question is, you say this job has made you resent men, but is it possible that that is only half of it? Perhaps the job has changed you as a person as well, the same way it changed my friend. Maybe, and I am asking this, not implying it, half of you resents the types of men who frequent your place of work, and the other half resents yourself for putting yourself in this kind of business?

Like I said, I'm not trying to offend and I am most certainly not trying to put down. I am very close to several women who are strippers (including some family members), and I understand the decision to do it. I i only would like for you to elaborate on your stance that it has made you resent men.

tcaviar38 karma

It has changed me as a person, and actually made me value my life more. I actually went back into school and got accepted into a UC school...If anything morals vary from person to person. My job as a stripper does not define me. However, people will frown upon it so I do not reveal myself. I should recant that, I don't resent all men. I resent the ones that feel the need to be disrespectful and take a strip club experience for more than what it is.

FreeOnes_Petra32 karma

Have you thought about the potential for a future employer to find out that you used to dance and fire you based on a morality clause?

tcaviar64 karma

Sure. However I have had a recent livescan and background check to work with children. Came back clear

p0kes65 karma

Work with children? What kind of strip club do you work at?!

tcaviar81 karma

To clarify: day job

garrettrinpoche31 karma

what do you make on an average night?

tcaviar73 karma

On an average night, 6 hours of work 500-800

grant016 karma

  • How many nights a week do you work?
  • Do you have an "exit plan" or will you keep working until the money stops?
  • Would you say you're doing this because you want to, or because it's the best option available?
  • Does it ever go further than a lap dance? (As much or as little detail as you want is fine.)

tcaviar50 karma

Usually I will work 3 nights a week, Friday-Sunday. However these past two months, I have only worked once a week. I am a student at a certain UC school in California. I attend on a partial scholarship, therefore full-time. I will graduate in 2015...that is when I will stop. I grew up in a financially disadvantaged family, so I am obsessed with security. With a particular client yes. Money talks

cuzzard29 karma

whats it like being "retirement age" for your occupation?

tcaviar79 karma

Retirement age varies. Majority of the woman are in their 20s and 30s. There are few 40+

Many people guess that I am 19. Thank god for good genes

aisle541 karma

So.... you're hot?

dont_pee_there53 karma

[deleted]

tcaviar19 karma

Thank you for the clarification

tcaviar10 karma

What is hot?

ajking98123 karma

So I worked as a bouncer for a short time at a club in the Midwest. We were fairly busy most nights, and for the most part I have no complaints. My biggest problems with strippers, is how cheap they are. They would be walking out the door with $500+ but wouldn't even give me a $5 tip for pulling drunks off them, cleaning up bottles / tables, running and getting them food / drink, etc.

I hope that you tip your bouncers.

tcaviar9 karma

I take care of my bouncers and DJs with the tipping, and they know it :)

giegerwasright22 karma

How much blow have you done and, be honest now, how far will an 8-ball get me?

tcaviar49 karma

Back when I was a senior in high school...I tried blow. It didn't impress me much. But I have done my fair share. An 8-ball will last you a good weekend in Vegas

joseph_koney22 karma

Are you exotic?

tcaviar61 karma

Sure. I have a very unique look.I am taller than average with natural green eyes. It is hard to tell what I am. Sometimes I look Caucasian. Other times I look Asian.

itisthefirsttime15 karma

I'm guessing you're Puerto Rican

tcaviar11 karma

Nope Eurasian

joseph_koney10 karma

So i take it you aren't Asian or Caucasian then?

tcaviar75 karma

I am exactly 50% Asian, 50% Caucasian

joseph_koney15 karma

Do you earn more looking Asian or Caucasian?

tcaviar25 karma

It depends, the lighting is dim. Some people catch on right away. Some people don't mind the race. And there is always those that don't catch on. I would say I make money for looking like neither

rae404022 karma

Would you ever recommend stripping to someone who needs the cash (college students, for example)?

tcaviar34 karma

Yes. Get ahead while you can. If you have a strong mind though...I wouldn't recommend this line of work to someone who has underlying issues that may lead to destructive behavior such as self harm, or drug use

utherpendragon15 karma

What's your favorite flavor of ice cream?

tcaviar9 karma

I like those Mexican paletas...Strawberry flavored!

JustLetMeComment13 karma

Do you, or did you ever enjoy the job?

tcaviar30 karma

I love the art of pole dancing!

Reyalla50811 karma

I'm not a stripper, but a pole dance instructor. I say, rock on pole sister! ;)

tcaviar8 karma

:) I love that! One of my good friends is a instructor at a pole fitness studio. Glad to see someone who agrees with me

joshuatree8912 karma

how did you get into your first job or club as a stripper? do you have a very exotic stage name? or do you use your regular name?

tcaviar12 karma

I use a normal sounding name...I got into my first club with a friend of mine. We discussed an interest and wanted to try something crazy. So we did. Spur of the moment decision

memauri12 karma

Have you ever thought about doing porn?

tcaviar34 karma

No way! That is forever on the internet

entirelyalive11 karma

When do you expect to start seeing a decline in tips as you age, or have you already hit peak earnings? Did you make more or less at 19 than you do today? Did you start earning good money right away, or was there a learning period before you hit your stride?

tcaviar10 karma

I am at my peak right now. I made less at 19 than I do now. I haven't aged...I still get mistaken for 19

Shhhsleeping4 karma

[deleted]

tcaviar3 karma

Thank you, you take it at face value which I think most of the comments on here have missed. Btw I am in California not Florida

Silound3 karma

  • What was it that brought you into dancing for a job? Was the the money for security, or did it have some allure that drew you to it?

Interesting career choice, and big kudos for thinking ahead and having goals for your future! Good luck with your degree and career!

tcaviar7 karma

Thank you for your kind words! As a child I grew up extremely poor/financially disadvantaged. I watched my parents struggle and make major sacrifices for my siblings and I. I am obsessed with stability and security, also really into the art form of dancing (pole).

thediscobison2 karma

  1. What's the worst part about stripping?
  2. Did stripping affect your dating? For better/worse?
  3. If you had a daughter would you mind her stripping?
  4. What would you say was an unexpected lesson you learned while stripping?

tcaviar1 karma

  1. Watching some women (co-workers) dig a grave for themselves. The worst thing I witnessed was a heavily pregnant stripper taking shots of whiskey in the restroom :/
  2. It has sometimes, both for better and for worse
  3. I would not want my future daughter to strip, I would do everything in my power to make sure she is taken care of early on
  4. It made me see the world in a new perspective and to sit back and be grateful for everything

cuzzard0 karma

do you have a pimp?

tcaviar8 karma

No way