Comments: 492 • Responses: 17  • Date: 

RonaldTheGiraffe988 karma

HIV 1 and 2 + P24. Negative. That's after 22 days. So looking good so far :-))) thanks so much for the company during these long hours Reddit xxxxx

MommaMo190 karma

Glad to hear it. Now cover your penis next time so your parents can have you for years longer than what HIV would give them. Very happy for your results .

RonaldTheGiraffe160 karma

I will. I shall go amd buy a massive celebratory box of condoms and keep a couple in my wallet. :-)

dooleysdacrazy179 karma

The wallet is not a good place for condoms! They can easily get punctured in there. Better put them in a small sturdy case.

RonaldTheGiraffe34 karma

That is....sheer genius

jigak39 karma

Good shit. Go make that dubai money now and have an upvote

RonaldTheGiraffe15 karma

Thank you good sir, and right back at you

Str82thegut91 karma

Isn't being deported the least of your problems if that is the case?

RonaldTheGiraffe102 karma

Yes, it is. It's just that if I got HIV in the UK, although devastating, it wouldn't be as humiliating. Being man handled by latex glove wearing prison guards and handcuffed in an airplane is not what I need if I find out I'm HIV+

Str82thegut36 karma

Hmmm...perhaps you could describe the culture in Dubai? Im assuming that treatment would be due to their stance on homosexuality? I'm a bit confused, I thought it was a bit more progressive than that. Also, perhaps you could describe the process behind the HIV testing there? Are you required to get an HIV test by law? I don't know if I'm just woefully ignorant, but I'm more and more surprised the more you elaborate.

RonaldTheGiraffe44 karma

In order to get a work visa, one has to get a medical for HIV, tuberculosis and Syphylis. Medicals come every 3 years in order to renew said visa. Homosexuality is illegal with a 10 year prison sentence, but as far as I know is unrelated to their stance on HIV. I suppose, sensibly in some ways, they just want to keep HIV out of a country with such a multitude of nationalities making it their home.

DrMoustachio38 karma

I still find that law amusing on regards to homosexuality. One quick walk in JBR and you will know that it is rather common in that region. Especially in Sharjah.

RonaldTheGiraffe37 karma

Yes, I'm bi and know the gay scene quite well over here

stranger_here_myself20 karma

You should do an AMA on that.

RonaldTheGiraffe13 karma

Good idea :-) I may just do that

PimpTrickGangstaClik12 karma

I really do not intend to be hateful, but you do understand that statistically, not only would you be very unlikely to contract HIV from that encounter, but as a bi male having unprotected sex, you would be much more likely to be the transmitter of HIV? Just the numbers man...

http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/law/transmission.htm (and those figures are with an infected source)


RonaldTheGiraffe5 karma

Never slept with a guy. And was my first dodgy unprotected experience

jomkr28 karma

Can't you just fly out yourself when you get the news?

RonaldTheGiraffe35 karma

I could, but some clinics give the results to CID before giving them to me...

ferrarifan44 karma

Have you been to the indoor ski place?

RonaldTheGiraffe92 karma

No, it looks horrid. They imprisoned a bunch of penguins in there to amuse people

mrlooolz22 karma

He means Ski Dubai and it is fantastic. Although my friends who have seen real snow say it sucks. The Penguins are in Dubai mall

RonaldTheGiraffe5 karma

Nope they're in Mall of the Emirates. Dubai Mall has the aquarium

g-gorilla-gorilla32 karma

Your chances of getting HIV through normal vaginal intercourse are almost zero. Good for you for getting tested, because there certainly is a chance, but try not to worry too much.

RonaldTheGiraffe12 karma

After hours of Internet research I've realised this is the case, but I've turned into a mega super hypochondriac as of recent

ATravelingAccount28 karma

Run to your embassy. If they can't do anything, they'll tell you anyways (but most likely they can arrange the deportation themselves if they need to).

Quick google search gave me the adress: http://ukinuae.fco.gov.uk/en/help-for-british-nationals/

You can call them beforehand if they're far from your home, they'll tell you everything you need to know.

RonaldTheGiraffe7 karma

Thank you btw for the info, I will look into that

RonaldTheGiraffe6 karma

I'm hoping that the clinic I went to is as confidential as they claim, in which case, they won't report me to the CID and I can just slip out of the country. My visa is renewable every three years, which is when they do the medical, so would have plenty of time

trevortheox7 karma

By promiscuous lady, you mean prostitue right?

RonaldTheGiraffe8 karma

Actually no, just a very drunk middle aged Russian woman. No money exchanged hands

bluntbinge4 karma

was she at least hot?

RonaldTheGiraffe13 karma

At the time yes. Very. The morning after, no, not at all.