Defenestratedbear

How many prostitutes have you accidentally picked up in the last year?

• The Government

Source:http://www.cracked.com/blog/its-surprisingly-easy-to-accidentally-pick-up-prostitute/

What's your ideal pizza?

Why is it so funny when you refer to yourself as Daniel instead of just Dan?

What is your favorite pop tart? Do you like toaster strudel? Are your possible competing loves for breakfast pastries a source of personal contention?

Hey DOB! I've been a fan of yours and Cracked's for a long time, and I'd like to think I've read as much of your work as the government has, but I have to tell you that I think my favorite piece of yours is Bartender. (Link: http://obrienfiction.blogspot.com/2007/04/prologue.html)

This paragraph had me raspily, breathlessly laughing like a cartoon dog:

I'd say she was about 5'9, but I'm terrible at guessing a person's height.. She could have just as easily been 5'4 or 6'3, for all I knew. I was almost %100 certain, however, that she wasn't a midget. And that's what's really important.

And Bartender kept getting funnier and funnier. So, do you have any plans to publish Bartender? Because I think it's on the level of Christopher Moore for funniness, and the world needs more funny books, as you've pointed out before. (Thanks for recommending Moore in your article on funny books by the way) Also, where do you get the ideas for your articles? Is it organic and something where you never have a dirth of ideas to write about? Or is it a struggle? Thanks for being a funny, sweaty person. Specifically for the funniness. The sweatiness is also funny, but it's not the primary tthing that makes you funny. (Your love of spider-man, who is clearly inferior to Batman, is the funniest thing about you)