Comments: 112 • Responses: 45 • Date: 2013-02-25 04:39:00 UTCsource
Atomiskk20 karma2013-02-25 04:43:06 UTC
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Atomiskk24 karma2013-02-25 04:43:34 UTC
thewaterballoonist34 karma2013-02-25 05:09:16 UTC
He said "Push this button with your right hand."
thewaterballoonist15 karma2013-02-25 05:26:47 UTC
Ramza_Claus19 karma2013-02-25 04:45:01 UTC
Has your immediate supervisor ever approached you and inquired as to whether or not you were free to work on other tasks?
thewaterballoonist27 karma2013-02-25 05:11:53 UTC
I replied in the affirmative and he directed me to depress one particular button with the index finger located on my right hand.
razorbladecherry9 karma2013-02-25 07:02:18 UTC
Thank you for this awesome AMA. Have all my upvotes.
thewaterballoonist22 karma2013-02-25 12:22:13 UTC
Upvote this thread with a left click.
cornponious7 karma2013-02-25 04:40:30 UTC
What kind of buttons? The kind that hold my shirt closed or the kind that I loved to push at radio shack when I was a kid?
thewaterballoonist13 karma2013-02-25 05:21:41 UTC
The kind you push with your right hand.
OttStew1 karma2013-02-25 19:07:32 UTC
Are left handed buttons sub-contracted a separate factory or something?
thewaterballoonist1 karma2013-02-26 12:39:17 UTC
No. I generally just start with my right hand. My wife thinks I have undiagnosed obsessive compulsive disorder.
carl_lazlo6 karma2013-02-25 10:11:20 UTC
thewaterballoonist3 karma2013-02-25 12:22:28 UTC
Barboski5 karma2013-02-25 14:21:49 UTC
Are you busy?
thewaterballoonist8 karma2013-02-25 14:56:08 UTC
Flecdorbee6 karma2013-02-25 04:43:09 UTC
Do you make the buttons, or just inspect them?
thewaterballoonist11 karma2013-02-25 05:23:32 UTC
Actually, I push them.
Flecdorbee1 karma2013-02-25 05:29:58 UTC
Oooooooh fun! Do you get to push big, red ones sometimes?
thewaterballoonist14 karma2013-02-25 12:17:13 UTC
Sometimes my boss comes to me and says, "Joe, are you busy?" I say, "no." He says, "push this button with your right hand."
trillaphon5 karma2013-02-25 09:45:15 UTC
Hey Joe! Does your job keep you very busy?
thewaterballoonist13 karma2013-02-25 12:19:05 UTC
Generally, if my boss comes to me and says, "Joe, are you busy?" I'll say, "no."
chickencorn5 karma2013-02-25 04:53:44 UTC
What exactly is the purpose of turning that button with your right hand? Is it really integral to the button making process?
thewaterballoonist24 karma2013-02-25 05:21:11 UTC
The right hand isn't always necessary. For example, one day my boss came to me. He said, "Joe, are you busy?" I said "No." He said push this button with your LEFT hand.
thewaterballoonist16 karma2013-02-25 05:25:04 UTC
I was already pushing a button with my right hand, so that may have had something to do with it.
chickencorn3 karma2013-02-25 13:55:39 UTC
So, wait, you push the button at your button factory? At the button factory near me, I've heard that they turn the button. What accounts for the difference in button making techniques?
thewaterballoonist2 karma2013-02-26 12:41:22 UTC
I think it's a regional difference. Once I visited a button factory in Maine, all of them were turning buttons. It blew my mind.
jw123214 karma2013-02-25 15:12:23 UTC
thewaterballoonist4 karma2013-02-25 17:08:10 UTC
elfish204 karma2013-02-25 04:42:21 UTC
Awww as a kid I always wondered how buttons were made.
thewaterballoonist3 karma2013-02-25 05:26:14 UTC
thewaterballoonist5 karma2013-02-25 05:30:03 UTC
Although I make the kind of buttons you push with your hand. You generally start with your right hand.
fungwah3 karma2013-02-25 18:16:32 UTC
Do you ever have to push buttons with your feet? What about other parts of your body?
thewaterballoonist3 karma2013-02-26 04:43:27 UTC
Generally I start with my right hand, then if pushing a second button is required, I push with my left hand. The third button I often push with my right foot, but on occasion I choose my left. I then push a button with my head. If need be, I have been known to use my tongue. By this point if my boss asks me if I'm busy, I say, "YES!" (or "yeth" if my tongue is out).
ComplacentPingPong3 karma2013-02-25 04:39:59 UTC
Typically, how many of one type of button gets made?
thewaterballoonist20 karma2013-02-25 05:28:38 UTC
I'm not sure of the overall numbers. If I have any free time at work, my boss usually comes to me and says, "Joe, are you busy?" I have to answer "No," and then he gives me an assignment.
ztptpro3 karma2013-02-25 16:41:03 UTC
What's your favorite hobby Joe?
thewaterballoonist5 karma2013-02-25 17:08:45 UTC
Well, I have a wife and three kids.
kcell2 karma2013-02-25 16:43:58 UTC
You had a major impact me when I was a kid. Thanks for all that you do.
thewaterballoonist2 karma2013-02-26 04:46:11 UTC
Glad to hear I made a difference. Sometimes it's hard to tell because I'm so busy pushing buttons in the button factory.
Dyevochka2 karma2013-02-25 17:32:53 UTC
When you're already pressing buttons with your hands, feet, and head - as I'm sure you often do - what do you prefer to use next, in the event that you're called upon to press yet another button? Tongue? Tushy?
thewaterballoonist1 karma2013-02-26 04:48:31 UTC
I usually push buttons in whatever order my boss tells me to. In the event that he leaves it up to me I go in this order:
After that, when he asks me if I'm busy, I say "YES!" (or "yeth" if my tongue is out).
PapaMountainGoat2 karma2013-02-25 15:08:47 UTC
What kind of buttons do you make?
thewaterballoonist1 karma2013-02-26 04:41:10 UTC
MilitaryBarbie2 karma2013-02-25 23:40:46 UTC
What are your hours and benefits? Is button pushing a worthwhile profession to enter? Where (or to whom) can I submit my resume?
thewaterballoonist1 karma2013-02-26 04:44:40 UTC
I make enough money to support my wife and three kids. Though sometimes hours are long, it's a rewarding job. Send me your resume, I'll pass it along to my boss the next time he asks me if I'm busy.
ClearlyDoesntGetIt2 karma2013-02-25 17:09:44 UTC
What is the most ridiculous request your supervisor has ever made?
thewaterballoonist3 karma2013-02-26 04:46:56 UTC
One time he asked me to push a button with my left foot while my right foot was already pressing a button! I know, crazy huh?
crazyjeffy2 karma2013-02-25 07:33:08 UTC
When will the traditional button cease production? I very much enjoy the buttons that snap into place.
thewaterballoonist1 karma2013-02-26 04:45:35 UTC
You're thinking of the buttons you wear. I deal strictly in buttons you push-for example-with your right hand.
crazyjeffy2 karma2013-02-26 04:57:32 UTC
I've never been more puzzled in my life. What purposes do your buttons serve?
thewaterballoonist2 karma2013-02-26 05:02:44 UTC
I push them
crazyjeffy1 karma2013-02-26 06:40:05 UTC
I must see what one of these right hand only buttons look like
thewaterballoonist2 karma2013-02-26 12:37:00 UTC
They're virtually indistinguishable from buttons you push with your left hand.
Pocketsun2 karma2013-02-25 16:52:03 UTC
Just wanted to pop in and say hello!
thewaterballoonist2 karma2013-02-25 17:21:31 UTC
OttStew1 karma2013-02-25 19:05:31 UTC
This is for my friend Kirk (he's looking for a career change)...Is working at a button factory better or worse than working a cracker factory?
thewaterballoonist3 karma2013-02-26 04:50:35 UTC
I've never worked in a cracker factory before, but I can tell you working in a button factory has helped me support my wife and three kids. Two of them are through college now and the third is in his junior year studying liberal arts, whatever the hell that means. That kid is either going to end up in grad school or working with me at the button factory. Not that it's a bad gig, but I always thought of it more as a job than a calling. I really want him to find his bliss, you know?
Fap_Fapperson1 karma2013-02-26 03:35:01 UTC
hows the dog wife and two kids thing going for ya?
thewaterballoonist1 karma2013-02-26 04:53:27 UTC
It's great. I'm getting pretty close to retirement so I'll get to spend a lot more time with them soon!
Ardentis1 karma2013-02-25 21:55:36 UTC
thewaterballoonist1 karma2013-02-26 04:52:36 UTC
We used to have a dog.
dcebulsk1 karma2013-02-25 19:55:09 UTC
thewaterballoonist1 karma2013-02-26 04:51:31 UTC
HipsterAlerts1 karma2013-02-25 20:22:28 UTC
Who's got the button?
thewaterballoonist1 karma2013-02-26 04:51:42 UTC
My boss generally.
Vander_Dander1 karma2013-02-25 21:30:47 UTC
Joe, when you push this button, what happens?!
thewaterballoonist2 karma2013-02-26 04:52:18 UTC
Someone you've never met before dies, but you get paid a million dollars.
canarysleigh1 karma2013-02-26 01:54:49 UTC
Hi Joe! Are you busy? If no, can you turn the button with your right hand?
thewaterballoonist2 karma2013-02-26 04:52:47 UTC
TChuff1 karma2013-02-25 12:29:49 UTC
How do you and those in your industry feel about those who work in zipper factories?
thewaterballoonist4 karma2013-02-25 12:40:46 UTC
I have a friend in the zipper industry. We have to maintain solidarity. The only real difference is when his boss comes to him and asks him if he's busy and he says no, he has to zip a zipper with his right hand.
iR3MO1 karma2013-02-25 12:30:22 UTC
Your name seems to suggest that your profession includes water balloons... Which one is it, joe?! Dammit, I'm getting real tired of your shit!
thewaterballoonist3 karma2013-02-25 12:41:40 UTC
I have a life outside of work. I have a wide and three kids.
appajack293 karma2013-02-25 18:42:54 UTC
What kind of wide is it? How wide? PLEASE ANSWER
thewaterballoonist1 karma2013-02-26 04:54:25 UTC
Whoops, that's supposed to be wife. You think I'd be better at typing considering my profession.
thewaterballoonist1 karma2013-02-26 04:54:48 UTC
Also, I don't think my wife would appreciate being called a wide.
Kilir1 karma2013-02-25 17:30:10 UTC
I LOVED this back in Lamb Chop, except the name was Flo and -she- worked in a button factory. My sister and I would do it over and over.
thewaterballoonist3 karma2013-02-26 04:56:13 UTC
Oh, Flo. She and I once got drunk at the office Christmas party and... I'd better not say any more.
SniperRezil1 karma2013-02-25 12:45:41 UTC
Something tells me this job must be cool, how is it?
thewaterballoonist1 karma2013-02-26 04:55:12 UTC
It pays the bills. I have a wife and three kids to support after all.
sweetsister1 karma2013-02-25 19:45:25 UTC
thewaterballoonist2 karma2013-02-26 04:51:24 UTC
Right hand, left hand, right foot, head and tongue. That's five.
ifrogotmyname0 karma2013-02-25 15:08:27 UTC
still pushing those buttons joe?
thewaterballoonist2 karma2013-02-26 04:56:26 UTC
monokoo940 karma2013-02-25 14:06:10 UTC
Fuck you and this exercise
thewaterballoonist6 karma2013-02-26 04:55:25 UTC
I'm sorry if I'm pushing your buttons.
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