IAmA relic from the 90's named Fat Kev Smith. AMA about Rampart (or movies I had something to do with)

Why are there no plus sized women in your films? You tend to be very outspoken about the issues of weight, but I've yet to see a big woman in your film. Will that change soon?

If I'M not a plus sized woman, I don't know who is. Clearly, SHE wears the pants in this household: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LrqV9Lee-vU&list=UUMUyXED1r2JjVHtcHJd_aUg&index=4&feature=plcp

Tell you what: next flick I make, I'm gonna put some zaftig ladies up on that screen. Just don't ask me to get the one from PITCH PERFECT: she's way too expensive now.

I'm currently compiling a collection of stills from your movies where you see the boom mic in the shot. Would you like to see what I have so far?

Fuck yes!

I'm coming to NYC to do THE SECRET STASH live at the Gramercy Theater this Friday! You coming? http://smodcast.com/secretstashlive

I asked you this on twitter last week and you favorited the tweet but failed to answer the question. Was Dante's ex fucking an Asian who was studying Design, or a dude studying Asian Design?

It's like the top at the end of INCEPTION, man: it's up to the viewer.

Same with Bartleby at the end of DOGMA: most cats ask "Did he go to Hell or Heaven after that moment with God before she blows his head off." And I've always felt that beat, too, was in the eye of the beholder.

Folks also ask about the end of CHASING AMY a bit. "Do Holden and Alyssa get together?" I've always felt that a romantic thinks they pair will get back together and a realist knows that can't happen.

At what age will you let your daughter see your flicks? Read your books and essays?

We showed Harley JAY & SILENT BOB STRIKE BACK with the volume turned down when she was four. My wife Jen's in the movie too and it blew the kid's mind to see her Mother firing guns and jumping over shit. Even weirder for her was when Dad and Uncle Jay were hanging out with the Scooby gang. Then she went all Troll on me and started saying "That's not Shaggy. Shaggy wears a GREEN shirt." Everyone's a critic - even my kid.

Harley's 13 now and allowed to watch the flicks. But like most cineastes, she elects not to.

Apologies for all the questions I didn't get to, but it's been 3 hours of fun and now I've gotta go back to work.

But don't feel too bad for me: Work, in this instance, is smoking a joint while listening to music cues for a cartoon starring me and my friend.

Thanks for hanging out and chit-chattin'. I'll be back again next month, because the secret to inner-peace is to get lit and Reddit!

Meantime, I'll close out with some last minute whorin'...

• COMIC BOOK MEN returns to for SEASON 2 this Sunday after the Zombie power hour block on AMC! http://www.amctv.com/shows/comic-book-men

• But before that: This FRIDAY, I'll be at the NEW YORK COMICCON with Bry, Walt, Ming and Mike for the COMIC BOOK MEN panel - 2:45 to 3:45! http://nycc12.mapyourshow.com/5_0/sessions/sessiondetails.cfm?ScheduledSessionID=1EA9C8

• And at 10:30 Friday night, come to the Gramercy Theater for a SModCo first, when THE SECRET STASH records LIVE in front of an audience for the first time! Tickets here: http://www.livenation.com/event/000049410BE14D81?c=LNSM_CT_NewYorkGT_KevinSmith_twt_promo_100212 Never heard THE SECRET STASH? It's X-rated comic book talk (what I do for a living, essentially) Give it a listen: http://smodcast.com/channels/the-secret-stash/

• BOSTON! I'm gonna invade your Masshole SATURDAY NIGHT at The Wilbur! Come AMA in real life at AN EVENING WITH KEVIN SMITH! http://www.ticketmaster.com/event/010048DC95D94D50?camefrom=cfc_boswilbur_KEVIN

• And MARYLAND! You wanna GET OLD with me and Jay Mewes? We're coming to the Silver Spring Fillmore NEXT WEEK! It's a hop, skip and a jump from WASHINGTON, D.C.! http://www.livenation.com/event/1500491EB4D43FA2?crosssite=TM_US:973547:172548

• Is there a live SModCo show near you? Find out at http://seesmod.com/

• Wanna see some shit? Subscribe to my YouTube channel: http://seesmod.tv

• Bored and looking for something to do? SModCo is your pusher: http://smodcast.com/

Thanks for asking me anything, folks. Now stop reading about some fat ass who made his dreams come true and go make YOUR dreams come true instead! That's my parting advice to you.

That and this: Go tell your Mom you love her.

One more piece of advice: Watch some BATMAN: BRAVE AND BOLD if you're looking for a pick-me-up. That shit's gold.

And with that, I revert to Silent Bob mode...

WARNING: The following reads like the lead-up to giving someone head. If that's not your thing, move along.

Hey Kevin!

After your show at Carnegie Hall, my wife and I had the great fortune of being invited by you to the COP OUT set in Queens back in June of 2009. You were a fucking class act and I treasure the memory. Thank you for proving me wrong that you can be genuine and kind in addition to being successful in the entertainment business. It's gotten me through some really shitty times in TV production.

Been listening to SModcast since day one, and love starting my week off with Scott/Ralph and ending it with Bry, Walt, and Q. In addition to the funny, you wouldn't believe how many times your pods have made me roll a tear or two or fifty.

If I have to ask something, I guess it would be what is your mindset since Southwest and Red State (two life changing events I would imagine) and building your SMod empire? Are you still staying strong with "go where the puck will be"? A beautiful and inspiring mindset that I imagine has touched millions of your fans.

Thank you for being more than an inspiration, but a true fucking saint. Got front row seats to the Gramercy show on Friday. All the best from Montclair, NJ!

I remember you!

I'm still trying to figure out where the puck's gonna be next, and I think I've got a bead on it now. Before we start 2013, I'll show you what the last three years have been leading up to. I think you'll dig it.

Y'know what else you'll dig? COMIC BOOK MEN SEASON 2! It starts OCTOBER 14th, after the WALKING and TALKING DEADs, only on AMC. If you haven't seen Season 1, it's on Netflix now, too... http://movies.netflix.com/WiMovie/Comic_Book_Men/70226293?locale=en-US

Waffles or pancakes?

One between two of the other - like a sandwich full of joy. With syrup.

If you could write/direct your own Batman film (theoretically unlimited budget/ total creative control):

• Would you adapt one of your own stories (Cacophony or The Widening Gyre)? If not, from which source material would you draw inspiration?

• How would you handle the tone of the film in relation to previous film/TV adaptations?

• Who would you cast?

p.s. - please post the second half of the Fat Man on Batman Diedrich Bader interview! That guy was fucking interesting!

I would never make a Batman film. I love the character and I love watching Batman flicks, but I don't have one in me. At all.

But I can TALK about Batman like a ma'fugger. I do it almost every week on my FAT MAN ON BATMAN podcast...

http://smodcast.com/channels/fatman-on-batman/

Shit's free, kids. Give it a roll. Most recent guest is Diedrich Bader, as mentioned by nosprings, and he's audio gold. If you haven't watched BATMAN: THE BRAVE AND THE BOLD, go do so immediately. It's fucking magic.

Do you think the NHL will get its shit together and end the lockout or are us fans fucked again?

The way things look, I doubt we'll see a Winter Classic in January.

But it's like they bet on: I'll be there when they come back. I'm like a cuckolded husband when it comes to NHL hockey, man: they can make we watch them suck another dude's dick and I'll still love them. And I'm not even a big sports guy; big guy, yes, but not a big sports guy.

Hockey's different. Hockey is life crystalized for three periods. We're all goal-oriented and there are people who'll help us achieve our goals as well as folks who wanna stop up so they can achieve their goals. And sometimes, you get punched in the mouth.

It's a tough game and you're gonna get hurt lots, but don't sit it out: playing the game's better than watching the game. And to master the game, simply do as Walter Gretzky told his young son Wayne when he was teaching him hockey basics: "Don't skate to where the puck is; skate to where it's going to be."

However, if you're in a hockey city and you've got money burning a hole in your pocket for some live entertainment? Come see my fat ass! I'm coming to the following hockey markets in the next 2 months: NYC! BOSTON! WASHINGTON! LOS ANGELES! BUFFALO! CAROLINA! PITTSBURGH! AND PHILADELPHIA!

Tickets for all live shows at http://seesmod.com/

Will you ever direct/write a zombie movie? And if so can we expect to see Jay & Silent Bob in it?

Some critics will tell you I've made a few zombie movies: they were called JERSEY GIRL and COP OUT.

When they tell you that, do me a favor? Call 'em assholes for me, please?

Kevin, I just wanted to say that your book changed my life for the better; you can go to sleep tonight knowing that your work has inspired a lot of people… I guess I have to ask a question too.

Hows "Hit Somebody!" going?

Thanks for the book props. It's a pretty powerful document for change. Empowering as hell because at the end of the read you're like "This fat piece of shit's a goddamn chimp and shit worked out for him! If Kev Smith can do it, what the fuck's stopping me?!?" http://toughshitkev.com/

Re: HIT SOMEBODY Still working on getting the script from 240 pages to a 150 page shooting draft - which is even then still too long for a feature. But I don't care because I love writing it. Since it's gonna be my last flick, I'm gonna work on that script 'til it's perfect. s'fucking delight to write.

Welcome to Reddit! Will Clerks the animated series ever make a comeback?

Man, I hope so. It was a fun series to make, and Dave Mandel still has some killer plot-lines.

Mandel's a funny guy, man. Hear him talk about making the CLERKS cartoon on SMinterview: http://smodcast.com/episodes/dave-mandel-part-1/

And if you haven't seen the CLERKS cartoon yet... http://www.hulu.com/clerks-uncensored

Are you scared for Harley to start dating?

I'm more scared for whoever's gonna date Harley: this kid's been an only child her whole life, the sole focus of four adults at all times for the last 13 years. She's not spoiled but she IS used to being well cared-for and the center of attention - which means she's gonna keep some lucky guy or girl hoppin' with all her dopey dreams and demands.

She's a really fine human being so I just hope she never settles for someone less than who she deserves. I have this dream my kid finds someone who'll always treat her the way she's been treated in this house: like she's the most important person in the world.

Kevin, you've said many times that you intend to leave film after "Hit Somebody". Have you been able to monetize Smodco in such a way that the network becomes your longterm plan, or do you have something else up your sleeve? Also, thanks for the many wonderful hours of movies and podcasts and q and A's.

Ahhhh... Someone who's been paying attention.

Yes - there's something up my sleeve. Somethings, actually. Expect a shift in the narrative before year's end.

Gotta change up the story every once in awhile, kids - 'cause the movie never ends: it goes on and on and on and on...

Information, as always, will be provided here... https://twitter.com/ThatKevinSmith And here.... http://facebook.com/yesthatkevinsmith

Hello Mr. Kevin Smith! Thanks for doing this. You're awesome.

Where, on earth, do you purchase your trademark spectacles?

Off the rack at LensCrafters, son! The one in that mall on Riverside in the Valley.

But I stopped wearing glasses about two years ago now. Realized I only needed them for driving at night, which I rarely do anymore because I fall asleep at 8pm like an old man.

I think the last time I wore glasses was for the cover photo of my TOUGH SHIT book... Tough Shit http://toughshitkev.com/

Thank you (and Ralph) for Hollywood Babble-On. Best podcast on the fucking planet.

Ralph and I thank you for listening, sir. Give that penis a sandwich!

Someone had asked about the forthcoming HOLLYWOOD BABBLE-ON pilot for television earlier, but by the time I finished my response they'd deleted the question. So I'm gonna use this space to answer it, if that's cool...

We're still in contract stage for the BABBLE pilot order of 3 episodes. It's been a painfully s-l-o-w process because traditional media doesn't understand new media. The folks we're negotiating with were initially calling for us to stop the podcast for the TV show and it took us 2 months to explain to a massive corporation full of lawyers why that would be just ass-backwards: why cancel the podcast that created the show - especially when the core audience is 250k a week strong? That's a remnant from the old way of doing business: "I buy you and everything you ever think or do forever and ever."

But with podcasts becoming broadcasts (like TELL 'EM, STEVE-DAVE becoming COMIC BOOK MEN and now HOLLYWOOD BABBLE-ON heading to TV as well), the industry is up against a new learning-curve when it comes to the old methods of doing business and drawing up contracts. You don't have to give up all your rights to get paid for your art anymore because you don't NEED a studio, or a record label or a network: they're nice to have, sure - but they're no longer the only way in. So many new artists are building fan-bases OUTSIDE of traditional media and then BRINGING the audience WITH them - which means new and emerging artists have more power over their careers and more say-so over their own livelihood than ever before.

So after a summer spent explaining all the way up a corporate ladder how stupid it'd be to end the podcast for the television show, someone finally understood what Ralph and I were saying. Hopefully, we can be shooting our Babble TV pilots at the start of 2013.

Speaking of BABBLE, the show just turned 100 in Reno on Saturday night. Hear the brand new episode right here: http://smodcast.com/episodes/100-2/

what is you're favorite band of all time?

Probably The Police. Or Run DMC. Prince and the Revolution would be on that list. Beatles too. And, of course, Morris Day and the motherfuckin' Time.

I think I've got a more substantial list of my favorite music on my Facebook page: http://facebook.com/yesthatkevinsmith

Thank you for doing this (again.) I missed you last time with this question but still wanted to know your thoughts on what you think to 3D for films at home? and at the cinema? Do you think this will continue forever or will it eventually fade out and die?

Also thank you hugely for keeping us all entertained for so many years. When you said in the last AMA that there's not going to be too many more Kevin Smith sets, how many are we talking? Is the hockey movie likely to be your last?

When it comes to 3D, I feel like "Ooo - Malibu Stacy has a new hat!" I'm glad some folks dig it but I don't need it.

Hit Somebody stuff answered above, sir. But if you wanna read a l'il of the script, check it out: http://silentbobspeaks.com/?p=413

Filmmaking related question, Sir:

I've heard you had ridiculously little time to edit Chasing Amy. If true, how long did you have for post-production?

If you could have had longer, what might have been different in Chasing Amy?

We cut AMY in about a week and change. If we'd had more time, I doubt the edit would've been that much different: there was only so many angles to cut together.

What is your favorite movie? And what was your favorite movie to act in?

Favorite flick is between JAWS, JFK, THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST, A MAN FOR ALL SEASONS and DO THE RIGHT THING. Those movies were incredibly influential on me - which is why I made COP OUT eventually.

(Sorry - that made me giggle. As you might imagine, I'm a pretty big Kevin Smith fan.)

Favorite flick to act in? CLERKS II. Making that movie was like really fun drunken anal: while it's happening, everyone's enjoying the fuck out of themselves, but for some reason, it only happens like that once in a blue moon (not too deep, though: let the person goodly enough to allow you passage set the pace, you pig).

We've been re-running the CLERKS II making-of series on our YouTube channel recently. They're called TRAIN WRECKs. Check 'em out when you're not busy and see what bliss looks like (and don't forget to subscribe to the channel while you're there)... http://youtube.com/seesmod

Hi there! Just want to say I've been a fan since the 90's, you sir are an amazing writer and director. Red State has to be one of the best films I've ever watched, and your work on the Green Arrow series was incredible. You made me want to actually start following that character more.

1: What's next for you in the movie/writing industry? 2: If provided the opportunity, what would your version of Avengers have been like? 3: How could musicians be able to submit their music to be added to a soundtrack on one of your films?

Gretsky is the fucking man, and Mewes is too. Nooch!

1) I've got one more theatrical feature then I'm out. 2) My Avengers wouldn't have been nearly as good as the one we got - which rocked. But my Justice League, on the other hand... 3) You can submit music to me via Twitter. People do it all the time. I got the theme for FAT MAN ON BATMAN from because David Manheimer at Complete My Song sent me music to go with lyrics he hadn't heard yet. Essentially a cold-call via Twitter.

Speaking of which, if anybody's looking for music for a podcast opening or just because they wanna record a song but don't know any musicians, reach out to Complete My Song. They rock. http://completemysong.com/CompleteMySong/Welcome.html

Hey man! As a fan of both you and degrassi (admitting it) What convinced you guys to work with degrassi? I was quite shocked to see that. Haha.

I fell in love with the DEGRASSI universe while working at Quick Stop on Sunday mornings back in the day. Jason Mewes would come down Sunday mornings to help me put together all the newspapers and we'd watch the DEGRASSI JUNIOR HIGH/HIGH hour on PBS from 11 'til noon. They were to me and Mewes what THE YOUNG & THE RESTLESS was to my Grandma: our "stories".

When Romney talked about cutting PBS funding during the debate, I know everybody was protective of Big Bird - but all I could think about was without PBS, Mewes and I never would've discovered Degrassi and I never would've fallen in love with Canada.

I dig Canada so much, I've always dreamed of becoming a dual citizen. I'm a North American - and that includes Canada, as far as I'm concerned. So I'm trying to get "landed" in the Great White North and be a citizen of two nations: I'm looking for some of that hot bi action.

Who wants to sponsor me in their home and native land? Scott Mosier gets to be a dual citizen, so why can't I?

Speaking of Scott - holy SHIT does he open up in the new episode of SModcast, SMODCAST 227: E-Mos. That shit just went live NOW: http://smodcast.com/episodes/e-mos/

Favorite movie of 2012 and why?

Either THE DARK KNIGHT RISES or THE AVENGERS.

Why? Because both made me feel like a kid again.

Favorite film, however, would be a different answer altogether. Ask me when 2012 is over. MAGIC MIKE is strong in the running, which you already know if you ever watched SPOILERS... http://www.hulu.com/spoilers

I noticed that Bindlestiffs came and went relatively quietly. Will there still be more SmodCo pictures films (not made by you) in the future?

BINDLESTIFFS is available through Red Box and iTunes but we're still heading to theaters! The Bindle boys and their BINDLESTIFFS movie are coming to Texas the week of OCTOBER 22! If you haven't seen the very first SModcast Pictures Presents flick, peep it out on iTunes: http://itunes.apple.com/us/movie/bindlestiffs/id519039615

When can we expect the 2nd half of Batman: The Widening Gyre?

COMIC BOOK MEN got in the way of the second half of Widening Gyre, but there are already 2 fully drawn issues at this point - maybe 3 by now. Since DC shuttered that continuity, there's no pressure to make any deadlines. Let's say mid-2013.

If you haven't read either the NY Times Best Seller BATMAN: CACOPHONY or BATMAN: WIDENING GYRE by me and Comic Book Men's Walt Flanagan, you can get signed versions here: http://www.jayandsilentbob.com/comicbooks.html Digital versions here: Cacophony: http://www.comixology.com/Batman-Cacophony/comics-series/1869 Gyre: http://www.comixology.com/Batman-Widening-Gyre/comics-series/3169

Not movie related, but I figured I'd ask anyway: How long do you plan on doing SModcast? I've been listening since episode one premiered and I honestly don't know how I can keep living life without it. Tell Scott that I would bear his children if at all possible, despite how much he hates children.

Rest assured, I will continue SModcast 'til my heart beats its last. SModcast and all the related podcasts are the story of my life.

In SMod I trust... http://smodcast.com/

Any stops to the metro Detroit area soon? I would watch the shit out of one of your Q and A’s

Midwest shows forthcoming, sir! I'd like to get back to A2 - the weed friendliest college town in America!

But you can sate your need with a DVD of the live podcast experience: JAY & SILENT BOB: TEA-BAGGING IN THE U.K. is a collection of performances from across the pond. And if you've never seen him do his thing live, Jason's funny as (Let Us) fuck! http://smodcast.com/teabagging/

Any status updates on Jay and Silent Bob's Super Groovy Cartoon Movie? How are you planning on releasing that to the masses?

The cartoon flick will debut in March! We're gonna tour that sumbitch around the world like we did with RED STATE.

When I wrap this AMA, I'm gonna shower and head over to composer Jim Venables' studio to hear the first pass at the score for JAY & SILENT BOB'S SUPER GROOVY CARTOON MOVIE. (Jim's the genius behind the score for POWERPUFF GIRLS and the CLERKS cartoon, as well as my favorite score he ever did, JAY & SILENT BOB STRIKE BACK.)

Wanna see a little piece of the flick? It's included in the SModCo Sizzle Reel from ComicCon: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eGdM3sq4qmo